Chasing Demons
by AnubisLoki
Summary: Loki returns to Midguard and runs into Bruce Banner. Both find comfort in each other and help one another to get over their own pain but when the Avengers and SHIELD are after Loki can Bruce help the god escape to safety and can he convince Stark that Loki's not who they thought he was?
1. Chapter 1

What more can I say besides that I'm done with it all. Does it really matter what I want or how I feel anymore, no for no one cares what Loki thinks or how Loki feels hell I'd be surprised if I even mattered at all to them sure Thor claims he loves me but I know he doesn't he only loves the idea of having a brother to make him look stronger, a brother to spar with he doesn't truly care what I think no one does. Everything I had ever known or thought I knew was all a lie, I wasn't even from Asgard, my own "father" still could care less about me, there was no one who liked me at all amongst the nine reals and I was always looked down upon as nothing more then dirt stuck to the bottom of their shoes. they could claim to love me all they wanted but I always saw behind their lies after all I am the god of lies or so I was, when I tried so very hard to prove myself but not anymore now I'm just Loki and nothing else.

Many say that I've lost my touch due to the fact that I no longer do any tricks or anything else that I had done so in the past but I still had power and every trick from back then I just choose to hold my tongue is all and keep to myself besides I was tired. Tired of trying, tired of fighting, tired of punishment, tired. Why couldn't all the torture end hadn't I already payed enough for my past mistakes? Did I truly need to be watched, to be struck down, cursed at? Did I still deserve all of that which had been inflicted upon me? I guess so for the scars never had time to heal before they were cut open once again and the sting of blood stained my skin, and the darkness would wrap around me as the cold held me tight it was the closest I had ever gotten to feeling comfort.

Sometimes I still went down to Midgard but not to do mischief but just to walk amongst them all and try to imagine life though their eyes, was it possible to try and start again here? No, I was a god I didn't belong here amongst these people and the Avengers would never let me sleep in peace always constantly watching my every move. It seemed I would never belong anywhere so why did I still try? I didn't that's the thing I don't try anymore. No spell books, no curses, no spars, nothing but solitude and silence. Even though I was no longer bound and imprisoned I was still in that cell, my room had become a prison of comfort but it didn't feel the same it had many years before when me and Thor were young and my powers were just developing oh how I wish I could go back to those times and change the person I was so that this hell was not my future. But not even I could go back in time and change what had become of me.

They never check anymore to see if I'm still alive they probably hope each time they pass my door that I'm no longer breathing and instead lay silent and pale as the life slips from my form, that's the only reason why I haven't died yet because I don't want to give them what they want no matter how much I wanted it as well. But I have to keep going no matter how much I just want to give up already and be done with it all already I could care less how I die just as long as I no longer breath and no longer have to wake up to this torture.

From everything that Odin had put my threw my body has been scared forever by the past. Tiny scar holes where my lips had been sewn, scars and bruises from whips, chains, curses, every punishment that I had ever endured through had left it's own scar upon my aching body reminding me at times that they didn't care how much I had been hurting that they never cared at all and never would. I could feel the tears brim my eyes once more at the thought of the past but this time I didn't notice when they fell nor made any move to wipe them away what reason do I have to do so? Should Thor or Odin walk in they would scoff at my weakness and brag of their strength, but if they had been through what I've been through then they wouldn't say anything, they don't even have a clue of the pain and suffering they've caused me every single one of them and they could all die and rot in hell for all I care.

There came a nock at my door and I ignored it it was probably Thor trying to get my to fight with him again but it wasn't for the door had been opened to carefully for Thor's rough hands, and the figure that entered was far to quiet, but still I didn't turn around from my desk I just kept looking down at the book I was reading hoping they would leave me alone but they didn't instead I listened to the quiet footsteps approaching me from behind and felt a small soft hand rest on my shoulder.

"Loki."

It wasn't my mother no she had died in the previous war against the dark elves and it wasn't Sigyn I haven't seen her in a long time, no this was Lady Sif but why has she come to me this time? In all my time here not once has Sif ever approached me so what was her excuse now perhaps she needed my help in which I would help her just to be left alone.

"Loki why are you doing this to yourself?" she asked, her hand still resting softly on my shoulder but her question had taken me by surprise but I did not answer.

"Do not ignore me Loki I know you're hurting just talk to me, I want to help."  
"Why?" I whispered

"I'm worried about you this isn't the trickster I grew up knowing."  
"I'm no him anymore."

She knelt beside me trying to look into my eyes but I turned my head the other way away from her gaze so that she could not see the tears that forever haunted my eyes.

"Just leave me alone."

She stood and walked behind me but before leaving I felt her arms wrap around my neck. "I still care." she whispered before leaving my room and once her footsteps disappeared the tears fell it was all lies they all claimed the same thing for years and look what their 'care' has done for me now? I had to get away for some time I had to leave Asgard. That night I traveled down to Midgard, it was a chilly winter night in New York but I didn't mind after all I was a frost giant we were immune to the chill of winter even in New York the freezing cold did not bother me in fact I felt a bit more relaxed. Pre-haps it was the low light streets or the cold wind blowing softly against my skin but I wanted to stay never to leave and I wondered how these mortals could stay so calm and then stressed and go back to calm? It seemed as though Asgard has always been a stressful mess but maybe that's why these midgardiens are far more advanced then us because they can go through life with their ups and downs and leave it all in the past as thought nothing has ever happened.

"Loki?"

I stopped for a moment at the sound of my name but after a moment I kept walking away it had to have been my imagination.

"Loki."  
There it was again and yet this time as I stopped I heard footsteps quickly running to catch up with me but I did not turn to see who was behind me.

"Funny seeing you here it's been a while don't you think?" I didn't turn around but still stood letting the man catch his breath. "Are you alright we haven't seen much of you in.. gosh it seems like forever has everything been alright?"

I clenched my fist no nothing's been alright or else I probably would have been plotting something, couldn't he see that I was hurting and wanted to be alone. I waited for him to get the hint that I wanted to be alone but instead just like Sif I felt the man place a comforting hand on my shoulder and I turned to face him.

"Loki." was all he could say I guess it was the sorrow that had replaced the mischief in my emerald eyes that caught him by surprise or maybe it was the look of someone who's given up that caught him off guard but he just stood there.

"Loki what's happened to you?"

I just shook my head he wouldn't understand, I just turned and tried to walk away but he caught my shoulder once more.

"Why don't you come over it's getting dark out I insist." I felt his strong hands take mine and I looked up in surprise as he pushed his glasses up and called for a taxi. Why was he being nice to me after all the years we spent as enemies I'm positive he still holds an angry grudge against me and his inner monsters just dying to escape and beat the crap out of me once more. When we entered his small home it felt warm and safe just as a home should feel something that Asgard never felt.

"Please sit would you care for a drink?"  
I just sat down not really sure what to say or how long it would be until I faced that horrid green monster that had haunted me ever since that day that I had meet his power face to face as I was crushed continuously into the cold concrete until all I could do was lay there and gasp at the pain surging through my broken body. I shuddered at the thought of all the pain and all the days I spent in a cramped cell as my body tried to heal itself with no cast or potion to help the process be less painful, the image of a blood stained body sitting above a tear streaked floor praying for the pain to go away and leave me enough time to rest a moment.

Banner came back into the room with two drinks and a bottle of wine and handed me a glass but I just stared at the red liquid as images off all the blood I've shed washed through my brain like a tidal wave and I felt sick.

"What have you been up to?" he asked trying to break the silence but all I could do was sit there in silence staring at the drink on the table trying to keep my composer, I would never openly admit it but i was terrified of Hulk not so much Bruce but his alternate personality scared me and has haunted all my days and nights giving my no rest at all.

"I know your hurting Loki. Please tell me what's happened to you?"  
"Why are you being so nice to me?" was all I managed to ask

"Because I know how it feels to be an outcast and to feel alone but the fights still worth it in the end." he to became silent remembering something in the past. "No matter what happens it's never worth the fall in the end surly you know how that feels to want to give up but when you try you just wake up the next day as though nothing happened. TO feel all that pain of being hated by everyone around you never resting always fearing what will happen next."

I noticed his hands began to shake and he seemed uneasy almost terrified of what he was and what he has done to people. I did know how he felt and for once I felt pity for the doctor we were alike in so many ways we were both monsters feared by everyone because of who and what we are and we both have tried to destroy that person to no avail only to have to suffer more and more the next day.

"Everyone's given up on the thought that you'd ever return and they no longer needed me. They don't need a monster on their team, they don't need the calls of panic about a terrible green monstrosity running around the town." his fists clenched and I tensed up as a hue of green tinged his skin. He was breaking, and I was Hulks biggest enemy, I found myself shaking as he grew even angrier. Bruce looked up and calmed down seeing the horror in my eyes and my shaking hands.

"I'm sorry I just don't like being this monster that I've become no one seems to care about me any more because they no longer have to worry about when I"m going to attack they no longer care about me altogether I've become nothing more then a distant memory I bet."

I was still trying to calm myself down but for some reason was having trouble doing so and flinched once more when he came closer to clear away the wine. I could feel my heart jump and had no idea why i couldn't calm down, why was I so jumpy all of the sudden was it because of all I have been through?

"Why have you returned?" he asked

"I..I..I." I cleared my throat "I..I just needed to get away from Asgard is all, to clear my mind." I finally managed to say.

"Yeah walking in the cold does help. But I feel like theres more to your story then your telling."  
"Why do you care anyways why I'm here? I'm not causing any trouble so you can just back off."

I stood to leave but Banner grabbed my shoulder.

"Loki please stay I know you don't want to go back and I promise the Avengers aren't going to come and lock you up. You don't have to be afraid anymore."

What did he know? I wasn't afraid, oh who am I kidding I was more then just scared I was terrified, scared of being locked up, of being punished more, scared of everything and everyone around me. Terrified of what was lurking around the corner and what would happen next, I put more thought into my actions which was the reason I didn't really do much anymore but sit in my room that way I couldn't hurt anyone besides myself nor give Odin any reason to punish me. Yet here was one of my enemies as well as one of my biggest fears and yet he was being friendly towards me when he had every right to hate me but instead he was offering me protection from the cold night and s place where I no longer had to be afraid. Could it all be true or was this just a dream?

"We've both been through hell the past few weeks and maybe we got off on the wrong foot but I'm not going to turn you over to S.H.I.E.L.D or the Avengers, I'm not going to tell Thor that your even here."  
"Why?"

"It's clear that your scared and I know that when I'm afraid it's nice to be somewhere safe with someone who's going to care. Well mostly the first part since I don't have many friends or aquantinces because of what I am but I"m offering that to you. Please I insist stay the night it's far to cold outside, it'd also be safer for you here."  
"ANd what if those pesky Avengers decide to come?"  
"I have a safe place under the house where you can hide and no one knows about it except for me. WHen things get stressful I sometimes go down there to hide and calm down."

"No one has ever been so kind to me." I was shocked by Banners manors "Thank you."

It was reaching midnight when he showed me upstairs to a spare bedroom that I could stay in for the night. It was warm and comfortable, even though it was small then mine it felt much safer.

"I can change the temperature of the room if you.."  
"That will not be necessary but thank you for the offer." I cut in

He nodded and left closing the door behind him. For once I could lay down and actually rest, I could look in the darkness and know that I wasn't bound and being beaten, for once I was safe and no on could hurt me not now any ways. Even if Thor had decided to come looking for me I trusted that Banner was right about his secrete hiding room under the house. It was strange how Banner was acting towards me, he was being kind, generous, polite, and caring, nothing like the green monster that he could turn into, not like the others.

I sat down on the bed, it was warm and soft but even though I was extremely tired I could not close me eyes, I was to afraid to wake up in that icy cell or back on Asgard to find out that this was all just a dream. I would rather dream this dream then wake up. A few minuets later Banner came back in with something in his hand.

"I thought these might help you they've helped me many times before."  
He handed me a few small white pills and I looked at them curiously.

"They're sleeping pills. They help you fall asleep and the best part is that you don't even dream so you can sleep soundlessly. Goodnight Loki." with that he left once more and I stared at the pills a little longer. I could finally sleep and not be woken terrified by dreams of horror, it was all to good to be true. I put the pills on the nightstand and I laid down to sleep. That was a mistake for I dreamed the same dreams as every other night. One moment I would be facing my father and then I was bound and gaged in a cold ice cell as I was beaten relentlessly, I could hear the tormentors laughter ringing throughout the cell, then I found myself in my room as blood swelled up on my skin and tears cascaded down my cheeks. I forced myself to wake up breathing hard and covered in ice sweat. It was all a dream I had to keep telling myself that but it was all real it had all happened before and I was letting myself go through all the torture once more.

I looked at the small pills on the table and decided to take them maybe for once I could escape the dreams and the pain. I fell back asleep instantly and was relieved to be washed over with nothing but silence and darkness, throughout the whole night that was all I saw, darkness and for once I was able to sleep soundly without waking in fear or startlement at my crude past but instead sleep on in solitude. When I woke the next morning I expected to find myself in my room back on Asgard but was relieved to see that i was still in Banner's home and as I walked out into the hall I actually felt the warm embrace of the suns peeking rays that entered through the windows. I found the doctor sitting at the kitchen table reading the paper and drinking tea.

"Morning Loki sleep well?"  
"Yes thank you I have not slept well since I was a child."

I joined him at the table and he set down his paper.

"I'm guessing punishment in Asgard is much worse then the death sentence here."

"You would be right. Being gods our punishments would seem far to inhumane to you mortals but never the less I would have much rather taken a death sentence over the torment I endured any day."

His eyes held pity and sadness, I did not want pity from the man I did not deserve such a feeling as that but yet it felt nice to know that he cared about my suffering.

"What exactly do they do? You don't have to answer if you don't want to I'm just curious."  
"No no it's quite alright I've been haunted by them for as long as I can remember it doesn't matter either way any more. Do you see these holes on above and below my lips doctor?"

He squinted his eyes and nodded noticing the small puncture wounds.

"These are from having my lips sown shut twice." his eyes got wider "And do you see how my skin is bruised and covered with scars? Those are from years of relentless torture twenty-four-seven as you mortals say. I never got rest always bound and gaged in a freezing cell waiting for my body to go limp and numb from hours of torture. That is what I have endured for years, imprisonment, punishment, torture, devastation, sometimes I wish that I had died that day."

'What day?" he asked

"The day me and Thor battled the Cursed a being working for the dark elves they had threatened not only Asgard but the other nine realms as well. I had been stabbed badly from the monster and was dying sometimes I wish that I had died then I wouldn't have to go through any more torture."

That day i felt relief I believed that I was going to die. The wound was far to deep and I could feel the very life slipping from me and even though it hurt it felt wonderful 'cause I knew that that was the end for me but I was wrong somehow I was still alive and once again punished for what? Escaping and almost getting the warriors 3 killed that was my crime! I had almost died helping them and yet I was punished for my help, I would never understand Odin nor do I wish to he's the true monster but like everyone else he only had time for Thor the golden child who could never do any wrong who was to blind and to stupid to see the truth of what was going on right in front of him.

"I'm sorry for asking clearly it bothers you." he pushed a cup towards me "Here have some tea it's great for relaxing."  
"DO you not drink coffee like the other mortals?"  
"No it's best if I don't have caffeine just incase. Don't want everyone screaming cause a monster is running around destroying everything."

WE both sighed knowing how the other felt to be a monster and to be hated by all around us. We were the outcasts, the villains, the monsters parents tell their children about to get them to behave. If only they knew our true story then they wouldn't hate us so much or maybe they would. Either way it felt comforting to talk to Banner about such things he understood it all and felt the same way I do.

"It's strange but I feel better talking to you Doctor."  
"Please call me Bruce." he smiled "Sometimes it's best to talk to someone as long as its someone who's willing to listen and care not many people have the time to hear of others misfortunes."

"Do you have time Doc..Bruce?"

"You want to talk to me?"

"Yes for I feel there is no one else who would understand."

He nodded and not knowing where to begin I told him everything. Every story, every memory, every word I ever wanted to tell but never found the right person to tell that was until I meet Bruce last night and so I told my story and there he sat patiently listing paying attention and never interrupting till I had finished my tale. When I had finished tears had formed at the edges of my eyes and I was shaking terribly from the memory of all the pain.

"Wow it must have been hard for you to tell me all that." I continued looking down but looked back up when I felt him clasp my hand. "I'm glad you did."

It was strange to be telling him all this but at the same time I felt as though a huge wait had been lifted off my shoulder and I no longer carried the sins of my past. I asked Bruce to tell me his tale as well and that I to in turn would listen to what he had to say. So he began about his childhood, his experiment gone wrong, all the pain he felt, the pain he had caused, the trouble he had felt, and his attempts to kill himself which all failed due to his inner monster stopping him at the last minuet.

"I just wish this beast would die already so that I would no longer be alone, so no one has to be afraid of me."

"I do not fear you Bruce."

"Of course you do I saw it last night you were shaking, even a powerful god such as yourself fears me."

I grasped his hand tightly and reassuringly.

"No I fear the Hulk not you. You are Doctor Bruce Banner a scientist and a brave man who has a terrible secrete. The Hulk is a massive beast who's mind is foggy and unclear of what's around him you are two different people sharing the same body but that doesn't mean he is you and you are him."

He smiled and we let go of each others hand.

"Thank you Loki that is very kind and not expected at the same time."  
"We share very similar sins Bruce. Sometimes it's best to be with others like yourself and see that you are not alone. Never think that you are alone for there are always others facing a similar sin."  
A silence past over the room but it was ok it was a needed silence to heal the wounds that we had torn open once more in order to feel something more. It was a silence that was needed to comprehend each others stories and to let the hearts soak up the pain and mended each others holes. In that silence I saw that we had more in common then either one knew and for once I felt as though I had done something right for I did not regret excepting the doctors kind invitation the night before. With no regret I started to see that it was right to come down to Midgard but I also knew that sooner or latter Thor would notice my absence and would eventually ask the Avengers to hunt me down and I would be dragged back to Asgard to face my father once more as well as torment. I would just have to hide from them and hope that the doctor would help me escape such pain and torment after all I trusted him now.

(Bruce)

It was strange seeing the black haired god the previous night and felt strange asking him to stay but I could see it in his eyes that he was trying to escape his past and a broken place that had cut him far to deeply. He needed to know that he wasn't alone and that there was someone out there who was willing to listen and care about what he thought and felt. He was right of course that we both held a similar sin upon our very souls and that in many ways we shared many things in common. It felt good to see the god smile, relaxed, I felt as though I too had done something right for once for he did not run away even after I had grown angry last night he still stayed.

Loki decided that he had stayed long enough and did not want to trouble me any longer but we both were thinking the same thing; "_What if the Avengers or S.H.I.E.L.D found him?"_ I told him that he didn't have to wonder the streets of New York for shelter and asked him to stay here as long as he needed and it was nice to see him smile once more as I helped him change his mortal form so that he looked very different and unrecognizable. That way if Thor or the Avengers saw him they would think he was a stranger walking around the city instead of an ex-criminal. Loki had changed incredibly since last we encountered each other and it was hard to wrap my head around the fact that I had seen him so scared, weak, vulnerable and terrified of everything around him.

As we walked about he was tensed and constantly looking around and I felt bad for him. Never would I have ever thought that someone such as Loki could become so terrified and scared as he was now especially since he seemed so strong and unbreakable the last time we met. Back then he was strong, dominating, un-breakable, and didn't have a care in the world for what happened to anyone around him, he had wanted control and power but now he was the exact opposite of that person. But I knew very well how he must bee feeling, everyone hated him and saw him as a villain, only I saw who he was and knew the truth about him for I was probably the only one he had every talked to about how he truly felt and it was comforting knowing that someone actually trusted me with the truth of how they were feeling since I was the reason most people locked their doors and kept guns in arms reach.

A week had almost passed since I met Loki that night and everyday he seemed to be more comfortable and more happy and that was good to know that I was helping him relax more and I sort of hoped that he would stay longer. I didn't want him to go back to Asgard only to be tortured more for having left for a while but how fast did time pass by in Asgard or was it slower then here? Was anyone looking for him or did they even care if he was gone or not? I always thought that Thor truly loved Loki and would do anything to make sure Loki was safe but apparently that was the very opposite of how Thor really felt for he wouldn't let Loki go through all that pain if he truly cared for his adopted brother.

"I have truly enjoyed the time we have spent together Bruce you have done a tremendous job at helping me. I truly feel better and have almost forgotten about the pain of the past."  
"It's nice to know that I could be of help. You have helped me to Loki."  
"In what way?"  
"By letting me help you I feel like for once I have done something good and it's nice to know that you aren't afraid of me. I would like to think we would be friends but.."

"You don't think we are friends already?"

I looked up at him and saw that content smile of his.

"I have never had a friend before Bruce for I simply used to not care about anyone and would have rather kept to myself but I see now what a mistake that was and I would like very much to be friends with you."

We sat there on the park bench watching everyone play and we both noticed that there wasn't one person who was alone everyone had a friend or a partner by their side and for once in both of our lives we too had someone by our sides. We each had finally made a friend and had found happiness once more. But that happiness unfortunately was short lived for I had caught sight of Hawkeye and Black Widow searching around the street on the far side of the park gate, I took Loki's hand and quickly led him back to my home.

"What is the meaning of rushing so quickly?"  
"Sorry but I saw Hawkeye and Widow searching around I think they know your here and their looking for you."


	2. Chapter 2

Had Thor finally found out that I was no longer in Asgard and had asked his friends to go search for me? No I couldn't go back there not after finally feeling relaxed and welcomed here, I couldn't face Odin again knowing what was in store should I be returned home. The phone rang and we both jumped at the sound.

"Hello this is Doctor Banner." Bruce answered

He listened carefully to what he was being told before saying goodbye and hanging up.

"Their looking for you. So is S.H.I.E.L.D."

"What why SHIELD?"  
"They know your here and are probably hoping to capture you before you do any trouble."  
"But I'm not here to cause harm. Oh please don't let them get me Bruce I can't go back not after everything that I tried so hard to forget about."

I felt myself tremble again in fear of what was in store should I be captured. I could already feel the draft of the dungeon, the sting of the chains, the laughter of the tormentors and tears brimmed my eyes.

"Don't worry Loki I wont let them hurt you not anymore."

Surprisingly he came over and hugged me comfortingly but that did not stop the tears from falling. He showed me the room under the house should they come here looking for me. If that happened then I was to sneak my way downstairs and hide in the small room that was locked from the inside. We never left the house after that day, the blinds were never opened and we waited in anticipation for the day to hear that the search was off and that they thought that I was no longer on Earth but in one of the other realms, the only other realm I would be in if not Asgard or Midgard was Jotunheim but there wasn't much point in me being there it wasn't like the frost giants would welcome me even if I was one of them I was still far to small to be one of them and after all I had killed a couple of them, but I had also helped them invade Asgard only to kill them in order to seem the superior son.

Oh how I regretted so many choices that I had made and wondered what had happened to the young boy who would read constantly, who seemed so happy, and had no doubts in the world? Why did I let myself become this monster that was always hunted and never saw rest? Neither one of us slept since we heard that dreaded phone call and it only got worse for it was even on the news that should anyone see or have information about my whereabouts they were to call the Avengers or SHIELD.

"This is getting bad. They really want you captured." I was terrified of what was happening it was terrifying being hunted wondering if they would find you or would you get by free?

But neither one of us was prepared for what happened next. Things were beginning to settle down and we started to hope that maybe they were finally giving up the search that was until there came the nock on the door. For a moment we both froze but when Bruce looked through the door hole to see who was there I quickly went invisible and made my way quickly downstairs as quietly as I could while he tried to get agents of SHIELD to leave thinking that Bruce had no idea of my whereabouts but it was clear that Colsin was not buying the doctors story and had the agents search the entire house for me.

I heard them through the room's door and I covered my mouth to prevent any sound but I couldn't control the sound of my quickly beating heart that felt like any minuet it would explode or burst from my chest.

"He's not down here!" someone yelled

"Fine thanks for letting us search sorry to disturb you doctor."

With that the door was shut but I didn't move in case they were trying to trick me to come out of hiding. In the room I waited and waited finally Bruce opened the door and I stood, following him back upstairs to the living room.

"That was close. Thank gods you have that room Bruce I owe you for this generosity that you have graciously showed me."  
"I'm glade to be able to help you Loki, I know what it feels like to be trapped and hunted and its not fun. I hated being caged in and I wasn't myself I was Hulk at the time and we both hated it we wanted to smash them all into the ground for treating us this way I think that was the only time we ever agreed on something."

However the search was still going on and even though we had no trouble for a few days afterwards I still slept in the secrete room under the house just to be safe. However it was only when we thought it was safe for me to come out were we wrong. It was so fast and I had no idea that it had happened. They came in and I was sleeping when they took me away. When I woke I was bound and thought to be in Asgard but I was also blindfolded which proved that I was still in Midgard, but where I did not know but all I wanted was to escape, I struggled against the bounds but they were steel and they were to tight for me to break out of but I continued to struggle hoping to get free some way but stopped when I heard laughter.

"You truly are afraid aren't you? How pathetic to think that one of our greatest enemies would become nothing more then a pathetic, terrified, child."

It was Coulson speaking and I felt a tad better knowing that I was a prisoner of SHIELD instead of the Avengers, I knew that no matter what they weren't going to let Thor take me back to Asgard, they definitely would have other plans for me but again I knew it would cause me pain and that was exactly what I was trying to escape from was all the pain and torture.

"Stop struggling your not escaping nor matter what we've made it impossible for your kind to escape from this room. No one's coming for you and no one will save you cause none of them care about you get that through your head and give up already."

I stopped struggling against the bounds for he was right but what about Bruce? Was he searching for me right now? Someone had to be looking for me and would think to look at SHIELD for answers no doubt the Avengers would try and break me out wouldn't they? Or were they going to let Coulson deal with me? Was I truly that alone and unwanted but did it really matter what pain I went through it's not like I haven't suffered enough but why can't they see that I'm trying so damn hard to change who I was? Why can't they just leave me be I haven't cause any trouble here why couldn't they just let me be? After all it's not like I had any plans anyways I just wanted to clear my mind of everything that was happening, I just wanted some peace, some time to get away from it all.

No someone would come for me I just know it, Bruce would save me he has to be on his way right now to come and get me. Even if he showed up as Hulk it would mean that I would be saved and that was all I wanted was to know that I truly meant something to someone. I had trusted Bruce with my life hoping that he would keep me safe and now that I was now a prisoner he had to be on his way to fix this, I just know it he has to be coming, he has to be. But he was late for Coulson had already enacted his plan for torment. Everything that I had gone through in Asgard I went through again and again as he tried to get me to admit what my plans were but again and again I claimed to have no plan for destruction only to escape Asgard for some time but it was clear he didn't think so.

Every wound had been torn open and I felt the fresh blood sting my skin as tears escaped my eyes. I didn't care if I showed him weakness I was weak, I wasn't strong like I used to be I wasn't who I was before no I was weak and I was afraid of what would happen, afraid of how long this pain would keep going. Hurt knowing that Bruce wasn't coming for me anytime soon, perhaps he truly didn't care much about what happened to me after all and everything that we had shared together was all an act to get me to confess my deepest secretes.

I heard screams and gun shots from outside the room where I sat limply with tear streaked cheeks and bloodstained skin. The chaos outside I zoned out not caring who was there or what was going on but I heard the door open and felt big, strong hands lift me up but did not un-bind me, instead I was carried out as more gun shots fired and more screams as bursts of anger could be heard from my savor.

"He came after all." I thought smiling under the gag as I felt myself black out.

When I woke up I was back at Banner's home and he was by my side cleaning the several wounds that I still had from SHIELD.

"I'm sorry for not coming sooner. I had been drugged to sleep longer and it took me a moment to realize what had happened. I let you down, I'm sorry."  
"Stop apologizing I'm very glade that you came and saved me. I didn't really think you would come anyways, I believed that I would be left there to face my past torment all over again but instead you..Hulk came and saved me. Thank you."

I placed my hand on the doctors shoulder and our eyes meet.

"I'm guessing you've seen all my scars by now." i said

"Yes. You were pretty beaten up not only from Coulson but from before I had no idea that this was what happens at Asgard, if I knew then I would never have let Thor take you back."  
"Even though Thor knows what I have been through not once has he ever come visited me to see if I was doing alright he too abandoned me that's why he always said that I needed to go home for a right punishment he too no longer cared much about me either."  
"It's wrong for you to be treated this way no matter what it was that you did no one deserves that kind of punishment. How have you survived past all of that pain?"  
"Experience has taught me well. I just embrace it, try to seem strong in the beginning and when their gone let the pain wash over me."  
"I can't imagine the pain you've been through. I'm truly sorry you had to go through all of that."  
"It no longer matters it is in the past and yet it is what haunts me even now. But being here with you has gotten me to look past all of that, you've gotten me to forget about it and reminded me that there's more to life then the pain."

I looked up at the ceiling as he continued to heal my injuries. But my torment wasn't over quite yet even with the pills I was haunted by nightmares of the past and of Coulson yelling reminding me of how weak I am and ow un-wanted I am. I would wake to Bruce gently shaking me begging me to wake up. He would then stay with me talking to me no matter how tired he was he would stay there by my side and make sure I was alright.

He truly is an incredible person never have I ever felt so comforted and safe, never have I ever felt like I actually mattered to someone before. THere was something about Bruce that seemed to take away all the pain and push it to the back of mind as a distant memory and I could focus on what was happening now. Even after my wounds had been healed I was still weak and it hurt to move and yet my troubles still weren't over quite yet. There was a nock on the door and I heard people filling in quickly after the door had been broken down. I listened to the running feet hoping that they wouldn't come here and find me in the secrete room but I was wrong for the door was slammed open and standing there was Stark.

My heart beat faster and I was overcome with fear and pain as he stepped closer but stopped.

"Back away Stark I don't want to hurt you."

Stark turned to look at Bruce who was standing behind him with no weapon but fists clenched tight as his skin took on a tinge of green.

"Bruce he's an enemy and the quicker we get him to Thor.."  
"NO. I will not allow you to turn Loki over to Thor. We were wrong Tony we should never have let Thor take him away."

"What are you talking about?"  
"I know Loki now he's told me everything and I'm not letting you hurt him any more."

Bruce walked closer to Stark and past him to stand in besides me.

"What lies have you been telling him trickster?"  
The old insult struck my like a thousand blades, and it hurt to know that there was a time when I was indeed a trickster and I played cruel tricks on people that got them hurt and broken such as I was now.

"He's changed Tony please believe me I saw what SHIELD did to him and he's hurting please don't make him suffer more then he has."

Stark closed the door and stepped closer.

"Show me." he commanded and Bruce pulled the white sheet back far enough to show all the scars and bruises that covered my pale figure and as I looked up at him I saw defeat in his eyes.

"Alright I'm going to choose to believe you. But he's not safe here you know that."

"What are you suggesting?" I managed to ask

"I have a secrete home in the bahamas that only I know about. He'll be safe there."

"Thank you Tony." Bruce said

"I'll come back tonight and we'll take him there. I hope you're telling me the truth Bruce."

With that Tony left and I could hear him tell the others that I was still no where to be found and that they would continue searching somewhere else. For the rest of the day Bruce and myself stayed in the small room waiting for Stark to return. All the while we waited in silence refusing to speak should someone hear us and tell SHIELD where I was or find Thor and inform him. But never would I have ever imagined that two of my old enemies would be trying to help me escape everything that was trying to attack me and drag me back down to hell. Never would I have imagined that any of this would ever happen and yet it seemed that the fates were playing some cruel game and wanted to see how I would react.

When we left with Tony in his private jet I expected the Avengers or SHIELD to be waiting outside the door but there wasn't a soul to be seen and the crisp night air held a sense of urgency as if they too were escaping something of their own and with that urgency we left New York behind us and headed off towards the Bahamas where Stark thought I would be safest but would I still see the same hospitality that Bruce had given me or would Stark continue to believe that I was an enemy and that was all I was capable of being?

**A/N review please might add more latter depends on what people think of the story so far so if you want to know if Loki ends up facing his demons again or finally is set free of all his pain then please review.**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N so I had some positive feed back and I just really wanted to continue on with this story. So here's a continued chapter, will Loki escape SHIELD, Avengers, and his ****bother? Will he truly be free? And what are these feelings for Banner that Loki suddenly has?**

* * *

(Loki)

When I had woken I was in a different room then the one at Banner's home, but I knew that I wasn't back in Asgaurd either, no we had made it to Stark's home in the Bahammas, we were safe at last but for how long? How long could I stay here before SHIELD or the other Avengers find out where I am and come looking for me. I know it's only a matter of time before they come knocking, before they come to drag me away to lock me away in an icy cell, bound and gaged, tortured for who knows what I've done this time. I just wanted to be free for a moment, to be able to calm my racing mind and find comfort in the doctors hospitality, not this. I didn't want to be on the run once more, didn't want to be hunted like the wild animal I had become to them.

Maybe it would be better that way if I did just give this all up. I didn't want to cause Bruce any more problems then I had done so already and I didn't trust Stark at all to keep quiet about my being here. But how much more torture could my body take? How much more pain before I went mad, before I lost it all again? Was it better to give up and go back to Asgaurd and just except whatever punishment was being planned for me? Or maybe it was better if I just killed myself, I could save everyone all the trouble of just ending all their worries myself. That why they wouldn't have to search for me, drag me back, punishment, they wouldn't have to keep going through this cycle they could all move forward with their lives never once having to remember me, smiling when the day came around to celebrate the day of my death, rejoicing that they no longer have to deal with me. Maybe it was better that way after all, everyone else would be happier and I wouldn't be troubling anyone anymore.

The sky was a bright blue and I could hear the soft singing of the birds outside. The sun light up the room and I felt warmth wrap around me and yet I didn't see the sky, didn't hear the birds, or feel the warmth. No I saw only darkness, heard their cruel luaghter, and the freezing cold of the stone cell that had suddenly taken over. I had been asleep, had been dreaming the whole time of being free. You'll see any moment now the guards will come by and laugh as they beat me, taking great pleasure in causeing such pain it was all a game to them. A game to see who could hurt me the most. I felt tears sting my dry eyes, I didn't want to cry anymore, I didn't want to hurt, I didn't want to go on.

"Loki? Loki are you ok?"

No it had been a vision for the warmth returned, the birds sang, and the sky was clear outside the window. I had zoned off, I was in Starks room, I was hiding, I was safe. In front of me stood Banner, concern in his eyes hoping that I was indeed ok but all I could manage was a slight nod.

"HAHAHA. What a joke no one's going to come save you."  
"You're weak, a fool, just give up no one cares about you."

"NO! Shut up."

"Loki?"

I looked up at the doctor once more, he moved in closer and was now by my side. I had screamed for no reason, he couldn't hear the voices, couldn't see what I saw, he didn't know what was wrong.

"Loki tell me, what's wrong?"

I wanted to tell him, wanted to pour everything out after all didn't he say that I could tell him anything and he would listen to me? But what if they were right? What if he really didn't care and was only acting to be nice, he probably already called the Avengers and they were now on their way here to apprehend me and drag me off to Asgard where my dream would become real. Tears threatened to brim but I wouldn't let them, I didn't want him to worry about me, didn't want him to keep pretending.

"There's no reason to keep this act up Banner. Please just tell me the truth." i asked

"Loki I truly am your friend this time. I'm not going to let them hurt you." he took my hand in his "Please believe me, you really are safe now."

It was all lies, no one has ever cared for me this long so why should he keep acting? I stood distenceing myself from him, I stood infront of the mirror looking at the monster that the world knew me as. I saw it, saw what they did. The piercing green, the dasterdly smile of chaos, saw the lies going through his head, the blue tinge of a frost giant, it was all there. The terrible monster that parents told their children about at night, that was what I was and that was all I was capable of being right? This was what I suppose to be, a monster but it didn't feel like me.

"That's not who you are Loki." I saw banner approach in the mirror. "Your just lonely, an outcast, your just like me." I saw the monster everyone saw him as, the ripped cloths, the green hinge, the anger in those eyes, together stood to monsters that scared the world and yet those weren't who we were.

Banner was nice and kind, he was hospitable and cared. Nothing like the monstrosity that had beaten me into the cold concrete relentlessly, a cold-blooded monster. Maybe I was the one who was wrong this time, prehaps I'm not this monster standing before me but the innocent prince I once was when I was younger. Maybe I was always him and this monster was just my imagination that had taken over my body forming me into this beast.

"Banner what do you see before you?" I asked

"WHat do I see? I see two people fighting different battles on a similar war field, two comrades against the world that's been pushing them down into the ground. I see a strong prince who's been through hell and a doctor who's given up once to many times."

"I see a boy pretending to be stronger then he is and his friend standing by his side." I turned to face him "Why are you doing all this? You could just hand me over and get me off your hands."  
"No Loki. I really do know how it feels to be caged and hurt, I understand if you believe that I'm pretending to care but I really do care about you Loki. I want to help you, please believe me, no one's going to hurt you while I'm here." he took hold of both of my hands and our eyes locked on one another "I'm going to protect you and that's a promise."

He smiled gently and it was warm, friendly, and sincer so was the tone in his voice. I don't know what I was worried about after all hadn't he kept this promise to protect me so far? But still I knew that it was only time before I couldn't run anymore, before he couldn't keep protecting me, before I would be punished for nothing. It was always about time which was something I always had extra of for it was all that I had.

Time? What a strange thing it is, some have to little of it and some have to much, some days its slow and others fast. It's never constant enough to keep track of, while the digits of time are always the same the speed of time is never the same and it was time that I was now at the mercy of for only time would decide when I should be captured and how long my torture lasted, it could be merciful or relentless. Time? There was something about the word, something...strange. I shock my head refusing to linger on such a silly thought that required no concideration after all everyone had time so why should it matter how fast or slow the day went by for now I was safe and that was all that mattered.

Stark walked in and sat down on the bed starring at us trying to figure out why he was doing this in the first place and I didn't blame him if he was ready to call the Avengers or even SHIELD and revel that I was here. He'd probably say that I took control of him again into helping me and that Banner had voluntarily joined me in whatever it was that we were planning.

"I don't blame you if you wish to turn me over Stark. You do not have to help me if you should feel so strongly against it."

"No I trust Bruce and if what he's told me is true then I will help you, but I don't know how long it is until someone finds out where we are."  
Time, there it was again. We could have a few days, a week, who knew how long we had to say that we were truly safe for the moment?

"But I'm sure it'll take them weeks to find out about this place not even Jarvis knows that I have this place so he's not here at all. Sometimes it's good to be away from everyone, you know?"

But it was too late, only after the words had already been said had Tony realized that I would know nothing of the feeling.

"No. No I don't know what that feels like." I said looking down at the floor.

"Oh, man I'm sorry I forgot about all of that."

I couldn't look back up at them I had spent years locked away from the world, the only time I was with anyone was being beaten that was it. After that I never wanted to see another person ever again I wanted to just deal with the silence and by myself with no people around to hurt me. Stark never knew what that felt to be betrayed by everyone around you and to be so afraid that everyone suddenly becomes your enemy.

"Tony maybe you should leave."

"No it's alright Banner."  
"Are you sure?"

"Yes I am fine just hurting as you noticed before."

I would manage the pain after all I had dealt with it for years now that I was no stranger to pain. But it seems that sometimes even the old friend had a few tricks up his own sleeve, tricks that in turn hurt me in the way that I had hurt so many others.

"So why exactly are you here anyways? After New York we all thought that you fell off the face of the planet Thor didn't even mention anything about you he even refused to answer any question that had anything to do with you?" Stark asked

Thor had refused to say anything about me? I never knew that he could have such a cold composure did he truly hate me that much for all that I had done to and for him? Had I not helped him end the war? Had I not in turn shown the depth of how truly sorry I was for all that I have done? Yet he still he hates me for it all because I was no longer the brother that he knew was that his resoning for this refusal? But never the less I told Stark of how I needed to get away from Asgard for some time, how I cam upon Banner adn his hospitality, as well as SHIELD taking me captive. It felt strange to be there placing my very life upon Stark's shoulders when I knew that he had ever reason to hate me but just like Banner he was willing to help save me.

"Loki do you mind if I talk to Tony for a moment?" Bruce asked politly

I just noded and walked out glad to be ride of the tension being built up.

(Bruce)

After Loki left the room I turned to face Tony who seemed to be having a hard time piecing it all together.

"I know it's hard to figure out Tony but he needs our help. He's hurting, he just wants to escape is all."

"I know Bruce but what exactly did they do to him?"

"I don't know. I didn't think to ask."

What did they do to Loki that had caused him to seek escape back on Earth? All I knew was that he was in a lot of pain and was willing to put his very life in our hands, us two of the Avengers, two of the very people that were the reason that he was sent back to face his cruel punishment and now he was looking towards us for help, for protection. Loki had changed within those years, he had changed so much or maybe this wasn't change but simply another warrior falling on the battle field. That's what we were after all, we were soldiers fighting a brutal war that no one could see, they couldn't see us struggling, couldn't see the enemy advancing on us, couldn't hear the gunshots, but we could and maybe that's why he was afraid. He was afraid of losing the battle afraid of what would come next if he did lose and only now was he willing to search for help outside his own domain.

"Tony I know you don't like Loki and probably think it's best we give him over to Thor but you saw him, he's changed, he's scared and he needs us to help him."  
"I agree with you Banner I'm just not sure what to think of it all. I thought Thor would protect him, keep him safe aprrently punishment there is worse then what's here."  
"He told me that if we knew what the punishments were we'd think them inhumane. I don't know what they did to him but I want to help him heal."  
"I agree Bruce." Tony stood and headed towards the door "Even though I don't like Loki at all no one should have to hurt that much. Not even someone like Loki everyone deserves another chance."

I smiled knowing that now we had Tony on our side I knew that within time we would be able to help Loki, we would become his friends, and we would protect him until it was all over. There was a moment of silence that fell throughout the house but it was short lived for within moments there was a terrifying scream. We sprinted out of the room and in the direction of the scream to find Loki on the floor curled up with his hands over his ears as if he was trying to drown out something that we couldn't hear.

"Go away, leave me alone!" he kept screaming and tears had rolled down his cheeks as I knelt beside him trying to get him to uncover his ears to wake him from his terrible dream.

"Loki open your eyes please it's me Bruce. It's alright your safe."  
"NO! No, no more please. Stop it just stop it I can't take it any longer."

"Loki please wake up your safe now, your with me and TOny no ones going to hurt you." I tried again

"No it's all lies, it's just another trick. I wont believe it, I wont fall for it."

I didn't know what to do to wake him, I held the God closer more comforting trying to comfort him, begging him to wake to realize that he was safe, that we were here for him and no one was going to hurt him.

"Loki please you came to me several nights ago and I invited you into my home. I saved you from SHIELD and Tony redirected the Avengers away so they wouldn't find you. Please wake up it's going to be alright no ones going to hurt you not now not ever again. Not as long as I'm here."

Loki's breathing was heavy but soon I felt the God return the hug and there on the floor we sat in another moment frozen in time. When he seemed to calm down a bit we pulled away and I saw terror pure terror in his eyes, there wasn't room there for any other emotion he was truly terrified of whatever he had experienced while alone. He wiped the tears that had remained away and sat down still shaking terribly. Niether me nor Tony said anything giving the god a moment to take everything in to remember all that had happened and where he was.

Tony went into the kitchen to make some tea or some other type of drink while I sat next to Loki on the coach my hand resting gently on his back comfortingly.

"You must think me weak doctor. To let such silly things get the best of me."

"No I think your strong Loki. I don't know what it is that your fighting but clearly it's worse then I thought. What exactly happened any ways?"

Loki looked down at his shaking hands that had a light tinge of blue to them, he watched as the blue dissapeared before looking back up.

"I had walked into this room hoping to clear my mind while you talked with Stark but when I came in I found...I found Odin standing there." he pointed to the far window "He had that cruel smile, a look of disgust in his eyes and..and he told me all those words again just repeated."  
"What words?"

"You're a monster. A villian, no one loves you nor ever could. He asked why I thought he never cared for me it was because I'm a freak, because I'm a monster who deserved to be punished. The room then faded into that terrible cell and the gaurds were there ruthlessly beating me again and again laughing as they always did. Luaghing because I was so weak, that I couldn't do anything to save myself that I would always be a monster and that they'd always be here waiting to punish me."

He began to shake again and his eyes glistened with pain this time to accompony the terror. I placed an arm around him comforting the god no deserved to hurt this much, no one deserved this pain especially not Loki no matter what anyone said or thought I now saw him for who he really was for he had been willing to diverge the truth to me. To know what I knew now about Loki felt like an acomplishment in itself, it meant that he trusted me which was something I knew wasn't easy for him especially not after what he went through but trusting me wasn't something many people were keen to doing because of what I was. But maybe it was because of that similarity within us that made us only confide in one another.

"Loki you don't kneed to go on if you don't want to. I don't want you to suffer any more."

He pushed the tears back and cleared his throaght but still looked down at his hands that had taken on a blue tinge once more. It was the skin of a Frost Giant, the skin of a monster that struck fear that was until the Asgardians had destroyed them in battle. Loki was one of them, he was their prince and all his life he had been lied to about the truth.

"I always hated the color blue." he said in disgust "It reminds of me of what I am, of the _freak _that I truly am, the monster that deserved this pain."  
"No Loki you didn't deserve this."  
"Banner you are kind but I killed thousands of your people within days and almost destroyed New York do not pitty me now for what has become of me."

My arm dropped from his back and rested upon his hands, the tinge of green from mine mixing with the blue tinge of his.

"We're just alike Loki. We're both seen as monsters but we aren't really like that. This is just how everyone else see's us but when I look at you I don't see a monster I see a soldier fighting for his life, fighting for a place to stand and belong, fighting for everything."

"And I see a friend someone who knows of this struggle, someone who is very kind and has so much more in life then he knows. Tell me Banner why have you helped me thus far, you could have turned me over to the Avengers or had left me with SHIELD and yet you came back for me. Why?"

"Because you came looking for a place to escape and calm your mind. That's what I had to offer but also because I want to help you Loki I really do, I care and I don't want to see you suffer any more then you have already."

"That is very kind of you Banner, I haven't had someone I could call a friend for many years, you'l be my friend right?"

I held his hand tighter and smiled as our eyes meet. "Of course Loki we're already friends."

At those words he smiled and all the pain and hurt left his eyes and was replaced with a much lighter, much happier element but it wasn't quite together enough to be called Joy or happiness, they just shone with a brighter light then before and that made me happy. I loved every minuet that I was able to make him smile I felt like I had just acomplished something amazing, something that has never been done before. I loved the way his eyes light up in the light when he smiled and I loved seeing the look of happiness upon his face especially after all the pain that he's been through.

Prehaps there was also more to the god that I loved but I could not see it upon the surface no this was a feeling felt deep within but it wasn't right and it was silly to dwell upon such a feeling I knew that already I had already been hurt for feeling this way before but maybe that was because it was with the wrong person, it was with someone who truly didn't understand what I was or how it felt to hurt, to know that everyone fears you because of the monster you were, they could never understand that feeling but Loki did. He knew what it felt like to be hated by everyone, to be a monster, to hurt knowing that there are people out there who want to see you locked up behind bars and tortured so that you've not only paid for your own crimes but so that they could keep you under control as well.

If anyone would know the feeling it would be Loki and right now he was broken and I was going to be the one to piece him back together to help him back on his feet, I was going to protect him, help him get through this.

"You have very beautiful eyes Loki." I said in sort of a daze

"W..Why thank you Banner."

Loki shifted uncomfortably on the coach and I knew that I had caused the tension.

"I'm sorry I didn't.."  
"It's quite alright Bruce I'm just not use to such kindness, Most people just ignore me all together hoping that really I'm just a figmant of their minds which I guess they wouldn't be surprised if I had been just that. No one cares anymore for me they all just pretend that I don't or never did exist to begin with that Thor was the only son Odin ever had I pretty much no longer exist within Asgardian records."  
"Then why do you stay there?"  
"Because I have no other place to go. I can't return to Jotunhiem I'm to small to fit in amongst giants and there's no one else in any of the nine realms that would wilingly take me in."  
"Loki you can always come to my home." he looked at my uncertain if he had heard correctly "You don't have to stay there if you don't want to you can always come to me. My home is your home, I would never turn you away no matter what, I promise."

"You are very kind and I do not deserve such kindness especially from you. Thank you for doing all of this for me I do not deserve it but I am truly glade that you are here by my side Bruce. I feel like you're the only one who would ever truly understand what this battle feels like and I like talking to you. I feel like I can confide any information to you and to be able to trust someone again means a lot."

Again our eyes locked on one another, our hands clasped tightly, and two hearts beating together never have I heard such melody within the moment of silence before.

(Loki)

I never thought that someone could actually come to still care for me, I believed that I was truly a lost cause to the world and was simply nothing more then just a memory of a fallen prince. That I had become nothing more then a simple myth, Banner was truly an amazing friend he was willing to do so much for me even after all that I had done yet here he was helping me through the dark, guiding me through and maybe the small light in the distance was the way out, the way back to how I wanted things to be.

I wanted Bruce to be there every step of the way, I wanted him to be by my side helping me make my way back into the world and the fact that he graceusly opened up his home to me for any time that I needed gave me new hope. It gave me a chance to truly change and to prove them all wrong that I did want to change, that I was sorry for all that I had done and maybe if they had just given me the chance that I had desperely begged for then I wouldn't be running, I wouldn't be here but then again that would mean that I wouldn't have struck up this great bound with Banner.

What I felt inside was something that I haven't felt since my mother was by my side, when she left everything died but now I had that light once more in the form of Bruce Banner. His eyes held a different light, one that couldn't be obsquered by dark feelings such as sadness as mine often portrayed, no and his face always had a friendly smile to help brighten up the room, his hands were strong but soft and fit mine perfectly and when he wrapped his arms around me I felt safe like no matter what would happen I was truly safe and nothing would hurt me as long as I was by his side and I loved that feeling of protection. It was something new and comforting, during my imprisonment I saw all of them as vile creatures and I never thought that I could ever learn to trust or even like anyone ever again but Banner was different he gave me hope, showed me that there were still a few good people in the world that would always be there to shine light on those who found themselves trapped by darkness, he would be there to take them by the hand and lead them out of the darkness into the light and safety.


	4. Chapter 4

_He doesn't care about you._

_It's all a lie._

_watch any moment they'll come through that door and take you._

_He wont stop them, he'll just sit there watching._

Were they right though? What if he really was acting there was always that moment of darkness of not knowing what was really going through his mind but my powers had diminshed through my imprisonment and I no longer could read minds but maybe that was bliss not knowing the truth of what was really going to happen, I would just have to wait but I did hope they were wrong I hoped that maybe one day I would truly be free. But that in itself was a bliss that I would never have, monsters like me were never free even if we're not locked up there's always the voices, the looks from those around us reminding us that we're vile creatures who deserve nothing but death but even that would be showing us mercy which no one wanted so what did they do they torture us until we're to broken to get up and fix ourselves, till we beg for it all to stop, till there's nothing left for us.

Only now did it occur to me how long Stark had been gone or how silent everything had become. It was oddly suspicous and yet still I thought nothing of it after all what was silence to a prisoner of the fiend itself? Silence that had kept me captive all those dreaded years, silence that had laughed at my own downfall, silence...

"Loki?"

Silence that had shut me off from the world. Silence that has been my enemy from the start of it all. Silence..

"Loki? Are you alright."

"Yes I am fine."

What a lie of course I wasn't ok when have I ever been ok? Maybe once when I lived a life of foolish lies but not now, no I wasn't nor ever would be ok.

"What's wrong Loki, you can tell."

"Always so honest Banner. No this is something I can not tell you, this is my own sin that I must face myself I do not wish to hurt you but getting you involved."

I stood to leave the room but his hand caught mine, stopping me in my place.

"Please, I just want to help but I can't do that if you want let me. That's all I want to do is help you get through this, to help free.."  
"I'll never be free!" I turned to face him "Don't you understand that no matter what you try to do I'll never be free because they'll always be hunting for me until I'm once again in Aguardien prison there's nothing you can do to free me."

"That's what you truly think? I know how it hurts to be seen as a monster Loki, I know how it feels to be hunted down, locked up, and tortured I've been through all of that maybe not on the same level as yourself but I know how it feels and once I thought there was no way I could get free from it all but there's even a way to shut up the voices Loki you just need someone to stand by your side."

No he he was just saying those things hoping that I would let him in but when I did he'll just go against me, call in the Avengers and watch me be taken prisoner like the freak I was there was no escape for me, never would I ever be able to be free or rest knowing that it was all over.

"There's no escape for me, there's no hope."

The tears brimmed my eyes but I let them fall knowing that it was all going to be over again, they would come marching in and I'd just stand here and let them take me prisoner why? Because what reason do I have to fight against them knowing that for a moment I truly was safe but under false assumption. But monsters like myself were never meant to be free, no we were meant to be hunted down and tortured and why because we strike fear into people but not all of us mean to do so.

"Some of us just want someone to care. To tell us we're safe, we're loved, that we belong."

One by one they fell, dripping onto the carpet as all the events came rushing back, the truth about who I was, where I came form, the monster that I am as I watched New York fall on its knees and why because I wanted to mean something more to them, I thought that if I had done something great then Odin would see that I was just as worthy as Thor.

"I never wanted the throne, I only ever wanted to be his equal."

I felt Banner wrap his arms around me but no matter how hard I tried to pull away he refused to let me go and I gave up as the comfort had seeped into my stone heart and melted the very barrier letting me feel something more then darkness and I cried more. What if I truly did mean something to this man who tried so hard to keep me safe, what if he was telling the truth? Why would he do that especially to a liesmith as many had called me as such? What did he see in this empty shell that gave him something to fight for?  
"I told you I'd protect you until the end and I plan to keep that promise. I don't care if you've already given up I want to show you that it is possible to escape all of this and be free. Freedom is possible even for monsters like ourselves."

"But why? Why fight for such a lost being?"  
"Because you're not lost, you came to me looking for shelter and I'm not going to let them hurt you. I'm fighting to keep you safe that's enough of a reason for me."

He tried to move back but this time I kept him from doing so, I didn't want him to leave not yet I didn't want to lose this feeling of warmth that I just now descovered. It was beautiful and it made me feel human to know that it was something I knew, something that even a frost giant as my self was capable of feeling. But is was the sound of the door downstairs being kicked down that terrified us both. Bruce ran to the stairs and when he came back I hide myself with an invisibility spell knowing that time had decided to be cruel and test just how far Bruce was willing to go to keep me safe.

"Natasha? Guys what are you doing here I thought Tony said you didn't know about this place."

"Yeah but his girlfriend Pepper did and she told us that he comes here when he needs to relax." she answered

"Well he's not here."

"Yes it's clear but we're not here for him. Where's that freak?"

Her words struck me and I could feel the blood and pain seep from the wounds her knives had caused. It hurt to know that they all saw me as a freak and that was all they would ever see me as. They ascended the stairs and I saw that only Tony was missing from the group as they split searching around for me as Natasha and Clint stayed behind with Banner.

"It would be easier on all of us if you just told us where he is Bruce we don't want to hurt you."

"I'm telling you he's not here."

"Then why are you here?" Clint asked

"I had to get away from the stress in New York and Tony told me that he had this place and that it was great for escaping the busy city."

Of course he would use the stress of the city and his own sin as an excuse for being here but I knew that they wouldn't believe him, why should they if SHIELD had probably told them I had escaped and that I wasn't in Banner's house that night and now here he was in Tony's "secrete" home telling them that I wasn't here as well. I could see it in their eyes that they didn't believe him at all.

"Please Banner we're not here to cause trouble just to return him to Thor."  
"Don't you ever wonder if it was a mistake giving him up to Thor the first time though?" Bruce pleaded

"Of course we should have killed that bastard." Clint said

"No Clint we shouldn't have. What are saying Banner?"  
"All I'm saying is to look at the facts. Supposibly Loki left Asgaurd and is here on Earth and yet he hasn't caused any trouble, what if he's just trying to get away from something as well?"  
"Bruce I get it that you want to help this guy but he's dangerous and the sooner we get him off of Earth the safer everyone will be."  
I looked around and saw that everyone returning to the room with their weapons armed slowly approaching Banner. In the blink of an eye I watched them attack him, I heard him scream in pain at their attacks but the strain they were putting on him prevented him from turning into Hulk. I watched from the shadows as they attacked him even after he was handcuffed and unable to move they still attacked him. I had to do something, I couldn't let him get beaten because he was to stubborn to admit where I was hiding, after all he had done for me I couldn't let him go through this, no I wouldn't let another sin rest on my heart.

"We'll ask one more time where is he?"  
"Right here." I said as I undid the spell and walked into the room. The fighting stopped right away as I exaimened them all.

"Loki no what are you doing?" Bruce pleaded

"I appreciate all that you have done for me Bruce but I will not stand hidden as you are beaten. Thank you."

I turned to face them, these were the hunters who finally found their prey, these were my captors once more, these were the people my brother called friends. One of the SHIELD opertives that was near Bruce struck him with a sedative but before he fell asleep I heard him whisper.

"I'll save you."

Not this time, no I knew that by the time he woke I would already be in Asgaurd behind bars once more. I approached Natasha and as I held out my hands she handcuffed me once more.

"No fight? Hmm I expected better then this."

"It no longer matters does it, you got me so why should I fight if I already know what's going to happen, I've always known form the moment I left that it was only a matter of time."

Outside was one of Starks helicopters waiting to take me back to Avengers headquarters where I would be handed off to Thor, then to Odin, and then to the mercy of the tortures. It was all just a circle, a continus circle that would never end, I would always be captured, always be a prisoner, tortured for no reason, it was who I was and what they did to people like me. There was no escaping it no matter what I thought or tried to do, no matter how fast or how far I ran they would always be waiting to torture me, to hear me scream and beg for it to end, to know that they could keep breaking all the broken pieces until I was nothing, not even air, until I no longer exsisted.

The ride was silent and uncomfortable well for them it was but for me all I could see was the cold stone cell, hear the screaming silence bounce off the walls, hear their laughter as I screamed in pain, felt the blood spill over my skin, feel the hot tears sting my dry eyes, hear the voices.

"See no one cares for you."  
"Your just a freak."  
"A monster."  
"You deserve the pain."  
"You deserve the torture."

Yes I did deserve it, it was all that us monsters were allowed, all we were capable of recieving.

"Might as well kill yourself now while you have the chance."  
"No one would miss you."  
"THey wouldn't even care."

"They'd celebrate today as a holiday."  
"They'd rejoice the day you killed yourself."  
The door was opened, all I had to do was fall. All I had to do was fall and once I landed I would be crushed into oblivion. Damn these tears that keep forming couldn't they wait until my torture resumed.

"How weak that you still cry."  
"You can't even jump out of a plane to save everyone."  
"Your worthless."  
"Alone."  
"Just kill yourself already."

All I had to do was jump, fall to the ground and die. That's what I did, one moment I was sitting, the next I heard them scream, I felt the wind slam me downward, closer and closer I got to the Earth I could see it, could see the houses, see the buildings, the landscape, and then it was gone replaced by the steel walls of the helicopter.

"What the hell were you thinking?"

What was I thinking.

"You could have died. What would Thor say if we told him that you had jumped and died?"  
"What would he say indeed."

I hadn't noticed but I smiled at the thought of them telling Thor that I had killed myself and that they had time to save me but decided not too, then seeing the happiness in Odins eyes knowing that another monster had been killed he didn't care if it was by my own hand or that he had slowly lead me to my own downfall.

"Why the hell are you smiling about? Did you do that on purpose?" Clint demanded

"Of course I did, how many people do you know would just jump out of a plane unless they had the intention of dying."

What a dumb question of course I meant to kill myself, I wanted to die, wanted to free them all of a monster, let them rejoice that I was now gone isn't that what they wanted? To be free of me all together, everyone wanted to be free of me so why was I still fighting?

"You have some serious problems if you want to jump out of a helicopter like that." Clint said

I took a glance towards them and all but Natasha weren't looking in my direction but I saw something in her eyes, was it pity? Did she fell bad that I had just tried to commit suicide only moments before and had she not screamed then I would have been dead. There was no reason for her to feel sorry for me, people don't feel sorry for creatures like myself. Once we arrived at their headquarters I found myself once more in that glass cage but what more would I have expected I was a monster and the only place for us is in a cell or caged up away from the world.

I sat down and leaned against the cold glass closing my eyes and I saw it all again, the stone cell, the dungeon walls, hear their laughter, hear my screams.

"We told you they didn't care."  
"They just want to see you tortured."  
"After all where's the fun if your dead?"  
"Yes no one can torture you if your dead."

That's all they wanted, I had become their little toy that they could do whatever to knowing that they were breaking me. They took great joy in my screams, in making me bleed not caring about the damage just as long as I ended up in pain.

"Bruce isn't coming for you."  
"He was looking at you the whole time."  
"It was only a matter of time before he told them."  
No Banner wasn't looking at me but past me, even now I know that he wouldn't want to hurt me in that way no he cared to much about me. It was just to late to already save me I would probably already be in Asgard by the time he comes for me.

_Yes you'll be behind bars.  
Doomed to eternal torment.  
Such sweet screams of pain.  
What elegent pictures will you draw in blood this time?  
You can still save them the pain and kill yourself.  
Yes why not break the glass and slit your throught.  
Or cut to deep that you bleed to death._  
They were trying to help me, the voices of all people were trying to help me end it all, end all the suffereing.

"No not this time just leave me alone." I pleaded again

_Now why should we do that?_

_Yes why would we leave our little toy?_

_You'll never be free of..._

"I said leave me alone!"

I punched the glass behind me and looked up as I heard it crack, I traced the crack gently and looking across I saw the other fracture in the glass from last time. I was just another freak caged up until they grew board and then their fun would begin. For now though all I wanted was just to be alone, I didn't want to hear the voices, didn't want to see the cell until it was time to return, I just wanted to be alone, just wanted to pretend that it was all just a dream and that none of this was real, to wake up in my room and find out that these days were just the product of having taken to many sleep sedatives.

I just wanted to pretend that it was all just a dream and that when I woke I would be the young Prince again so that I could change all of this from ever happening, if only it had been a dream but I knew that it wasn't, the events leading up to this imprisonment were all real as was Banner's kindness towards me as he tried to protect me to the very end but it was my own folly that lead me to giving myself up. But I couldn't just stand there and watch them beat him, he was there friend and they hurt him just to get to me. Never has anyone shown me such kindness, never have I felt such comfort and warmth before, never have I longed to feel that comfort now more then anything else in the world.

When I was with Banner I must admit that I thought I was safe, that everything was going to be alright and that I truly had escaped it all. What was suppose to be a quite night walk through New York had become so much more then I had imagined, it had led me to a friend, had shown me that there was still someone out there capable of caring, and that I still had a heart worthy of feeling such human feelings as I did only hours ago but now I would have to freeze that heart once more, it was the only part of me that had not been broken and I wanted to keep it that way. But I suppose it was time to face facts, I was abandoned now. There wasn't going to be enough time for banner to save me now and if he did then he'd be a fool, I was going to be locked up once more, tortured, and left there to rot and die.

That was always my misfortune, that I was born a monster who was left to die himself, because I didn't fit in, I was far to small to be a giant and yet to Odin I was nothing more then a relic he had won in war. That's all I was, I was dead the moment I had been born and yet somehow death had evaded me all these years because it would be an act of mercy to kill me. To die was something that I could only dream about, something that was far to out of reach for me, a merciful act that would never befall as my punishment. It was best just to admit that I would have to take my own life that way I got my dream and everyone would be happier with me gone.

I looked down at my hands as they turned blue reminding me of what I was, of the powers I posesed. Prehaps I could truly freeze my heart and die, that way I would die as the very monster I was. Yet I couldn't bring myself to do the act, something told me not to, that there was still time for things to turn around but I doubted it and yet I watched the blue tint my skin and all I could do was watch as I became the monster everyone saw me as. With nothing left to live for, no dreams left to live, no hope, no future, nothing. I pulled my legs in close and hid my head in my arms as I cried and I didn't care if they saw I didn't care what they thought for no one would ever understand this pain except for one person who was to far away to be here to comfort me and yet I felt him next to me, felt his arms wrap around me, felt him lean in close and tell me not to cry, that he was there and no one was going to hurt me but that only made me more saddened for I knew that he wasn't here, he wouldn't come to me, no one would.


	5. Chapter 5

Days had passed and nothing had changed, Banner didn't come neither did Thor perhaps this was my punishment to be left on Midgard as their prisoner. Yes that was the only explanation, I was to be left here as their prisoner, to be left to their own mercy, to be forgotten and never to return. This was what I had been submitted to, this was my new cell, at least I wouldn't be subjected to torture, even these pathetic mortals wouldn't do such a thing and the silence was nothing to me, oh yes I could deal with the silence and isolation. But still I thought of Banner, thought of how safe I felt, how every doubt left my mind, the feeling of belonging somewhere, to be wanted. Never have I looked back so foundly on the past wishing that I could go back to those days even knowing that i would be here once more I still wanted to go back on those days just to know that they had truly happened and that they weren't some trick of the guards to break me, that for once I had truly found peace and happiness.

If only there was some way in which I could still prove myself to them, to show them how I no longer wanted to be this monster, that I had changed during those brutal years but I knew they would only laugh at such a request, monsters will always remain monsters we couldn't change, so why would they ever believe that I wanted to change, that I was truly sorry for all that I had done, they wouldn't and just like everyone else they would forget that I was here as well. Once more I picked up the broken piece of glass and watched the red stain blue skin, it was all that I was still capable of doing. Even after escaping the pain I still hurt, still felt numb, still bleed not caring about the sting of blood rushing to meet the surface or the scars that formed, I was alone so what would it matter to them if I bleed or hurt myself it was just one more thing they didn't have to worry about.

(Bruce)

When I woke everything ran through my mind reminding me off what had happened the day before and as I rushed out to the back, taking one of Tony's helicopters, I hoped that I wasn't to late to save him. How could I have let them take him so easily as that, let him give up knowing what would happen and all I did was watch them take him. I didn't know how long I had been out but I wasn't going to rest again until I had saved him even if that meant that I would have to find some way to break into Asgard just to save him, I was going to do whatever it took. No one deserves to hurt that much not even Loki, I don't know what they did to him but it had changed him and now he wasn't a monster but like myself just wanted to escape all of it and find that there was indeed good inside us and there was so much more to him then what everyone else saw.

When I got to New York I landed on the platform outside Tony's house and laying on the couch was Tony, seeing him there when he had promised to help Loki as well and knowing that if he was there then he could have stopped them from taking Loki, it made me mad to think that if he was there he could have saved him.

"What the hell Stark!" I yelled throwing him across the room. "You said you'd help protect him!"

"Woah calm down Bruce, where are we anyways?"  
"Don't play dumb with me Stark where do you think we're in New York."  
What was he trying to play with I didn't have time for him to play idiot.

"Why am I here? The last thing I remember was going outside for...Shit they got him didn't they?"

"No you realize what happened. But then how did you get here if your helicopter was still out back? No it doesn't matter will you help me get him back?"

"Of course I already told you that I was going to help you."  
Maybe I had overreacted but still if only he had stayed then maybe they wouldn't have found Loki and we wouldn't be here instead we could have kept him safe until they eventually called of the search and everyone forgot about him. Then just maybe we could have helped him start again, start a new life here where he could prove to the world that he was different just as he had proven to me. I didn't see the killer that had almost completly destroyed New York, no I saw someone human, someone with a heart that could feel and cared, someone who just wanted to escape their own demons, someone who knew the same sin that laid on my owen heart. I was going to get him back, I was going to keep helping him until this was all over and he was safe, safe from the pain, the torture, safe to finally take off his disguise and truly show the person he had become after all these years.

"You really care about him don't you?"

"Just drive Tony we can talk later."  
"It's ok I get it you both are fighting the same thing."  
"He's changed is all and when people change they deserve another chance at prove themselves."

Loki deserved that second chance to prove himself and I didn't care if the others didn't see the change in him I did and so did Tony and together we were going to help him through all of this. Tony stopped the car a few ways down from SHIELD, inside was Loki and who knew what they were doing to him, who knew if he was even there still? That was all a chance I was willing to take, I was going to break in and I don't care what they try to do to stop me I'm not leaving until Loki is safe again, until he knows that no matter where he is taken to that I'll always come save him, no matter where or what obstecals are in my way I'd destroy New York itself it I had to in order to save him. TO many that would make me no better then Loki but it was the truth, I would go to the ends of the world to save him. People like him deserve the chance to change, to prove themselves, to show the world that they aren't always monsters and that even freaks can change and become better people. Loki had already proven that much to me.

"Wait here Stark this will only take a moment."

Tony knew better then to argue with me, I was already mad enough any more argument and Hulk would come out and I wanted to wait until I was in SHIELD and I had Loki, only when they'd try and stop me would I allow Hulk his fun. I went down the ally until I was at the back entrance closer to the cells where all their prisoners were and there I knew i would find Loki caged in the very cell that long ago had been created to hold me inside. I could feel the tinge of green start to take place and by the time it took over I would have gotten Loki and the fight to protect him would begin.

"Hold on just a little longer Loki I'm coming." I whispered as I opened the door and stormed inside taking out the gaurds that stood in my way not caring about the alrams the went off or the sound of running feet as soldiers came to stop me, I only smiled at the game that would take place, I would show Loki just how far I was willing to go to protect him, to keep him safe, how far I was willing to go to show him how much I cared.

(Loki)

The pain felt good, sliding the glass across the surface and watching the blood slide down my arm. I had so many scars, so many cuts, to much blood was dripping down as I laid down on the cell floor. I threw the blood stained shard and marveled at my master piece, marveled at the crimson blood rushing to the surface as it stained my blue skin. They had forgotten me, they didn't care, and soon it would all be over, for in their errogence they neglected to notice how much blood stained the cell floor or how weak I was. They would never care though not even if they did come and see my dead form lying still, they would only laugh and rejoice at my death, maybe Thor would be upset but not for long, for he too would forget that I was gone and continue on as though I was never there in the first place.

As I laid I heard the sound of alarms go off, soldiers running past to stop the intruder, but whoever was there was to late, or maybe they weren't maybe they were here for some other prisoner in which then they could come right in and let them for a moment glance and see what I had become, that I had become nothing more then an empty shell of the former god that I was, let them see what becomes of monsters like us, after our punishment has been decided and the torture begins, let them see that even after it's all over we're never truly free and sooner or later we die because we know it'll free everyone else from all the pain we have caused them and that even when they know that we're bleeding and dying that they just stand there, laughing and rejoicing that they're free of us, that there's one less monster for them to deal with, let them see the truth.

That was what I wanted was for whoever the poor fool was to see what becomes of people like us, those who just wanted to be an equal, to be great, to show the world that we're stronger then they thought, but in the end we're nothing more then freaks who will never be free of the damage that we caused or the pain and fear we carved into the world, that no matter what the world will never mourn our deaths, that no one will ever come to rescue us from our demons and that there's no escape for us, not even in death will we be free. As I laid there my body went numb and cold and I couldn't feel anything, I smiled as I watched the blood pool, but just like everything else I regreted giving up for before I closed my eyes and fell to darkness I saw the form of a savior, I saw him run into the room, take down the gaurds and rush into the cell but when he came it was to late and the last thing I heard was my name and the pain in his voice.

"Loki."

It was pained, scared, and the fear was unmistakeable in his eyes but all I could do was smile knowing that I was wrong and in the end Banner had kept his promise and he came for me. He actually came to save me just as he had promised if only I hadn't been a coward, if only I was stronger then I could have lived, I could still be saved by him knowing that he still cared but even that was enough for me to know that I would rest in peace knowing that I managed to find one friend, one person who still cared, to prove to someone that I had changed. I could feel him lift me up in his arms but I couldn't hear anything, couldn't feel anything but comfort and safety, I rested my head against his chest as the darkness enveloped around me.

This time tough the darkness was kinder, safer, it felt much more like I was falling asleep rather then the crueler form in which I spent years a prisoner too. Was this freedom? Was this how it felt to fall asleep in safety, knowing that nothing was going to hurt you? Was I truly free from it all. I do hope so, I truly hope that this is freedom and that nothing can hurt me anymore.

(Bruce)

"Loki."

No, no he couldn't die not now not when I had come so far just to save him. I picked him up and I felt myself change and as I did I felt Loki rest against me and smile, he was still alive, still breathing but barely. I only had moments left before I lose him forever and that was not something I was willing to let happen. I was not going to lose him, not yet, not when we had both come so far, not after finally finding safety adn comfort in someone else knowing that we could tell them everything and they'd listen and that they'd understand that struggle.

I ran out of the room knocking down every gaurd that tried to stop me and when the Avengers meet me outside not even they were a match for me nor for Tony who joined the fight, even he could sense the urgency and knew that time was not on our side this time instead it was our enemy.

"Stop Bruce we don't want to hurt you again." Rogers said  
"Puny humans no friend of Hulk."

"Bruce of course we're friends we stand together, we don't know what Loki has done to you but he..."  
"Loki Hulks friend, Hulk going to save friends life."

Whenever I was Hulk my mind became muddled but now I thought with clearity, now I knew what I had to do and I remembered the urgency and how time was quickly running out.

"If Hulk's friends then let Hulk go."

"Bruce we can't let you take him."

"Let him go guys we were wrong." Tony tried

"Your in on this too Stark?"

From above their were arrows raining down and then an explosion me and Tony didn't look back as we ran, I picked up Tony and didn't stop until we were back at his house. I would have to thank Natasha and Clint when I saw them again but for now me and Tony rushed Loki to one of the medical rooms. I calmed back down and got to work, rushing around using all the medical equipment trying to save the god, I'm not expert at medical care nor have I ever had to try and save someone's life but I guess there's a first time for everything never would I have thought though that one day I would be rushing frantically trying to save Loki's life especially not after I beat him up the last time we faced each other. Never would I have thought that he could change nor that I could take pity on him.

"please don't die Loki, please don't die."

The good news was that he wasn't getting worse but at the same time he wasn't getting better, his skin was still a mix of blue and pale, his eyes shut closed, his smile had faded, and his breathing was shallow but I had done all that I could think of in order to save him and only time would decide his fate which so far hasn't been so merciful to us. Tony left me alone with Loki, only at night did he come to watch over Loki so that I could sleep but as I dreamt they were tinted nightmares of Loki, covered in blood, dying in my arms, I could see the cell that was his prison, could hear the gaurds laughing, hear his demons mix with my won as they laughed at my failur. They laughed and laughed and Loki kept dying, kept bleeding the same dream over and over and when I woke I would rush to him, to see that he was still breathing and that the blue tinge to his skin was slowly fading and it relieved me to know that he was still alive and that they were all wrong, that he was still alive and I wouldn't let him die not as long as there was still hope to save him.

"Loki please wake up, I know you want to die but I don't, I need you to live." as I sat next to him I held his limp hand "I don't want you to die, I still have a promise to keep to you, remember I was going to help you, I was going to save you from it all. I was going to prove to you that there was a way to be free of it all but I can't do that if your dead and there's still so much more then you think."

It was pointless I knew that to talk to him he probably couldn't even hear me and yet I felt like I had to say something, I had to keep talking to him to let him know that I was still here, still by his side and there I would stay. I used to hate these feelings because they always led me to hurt those I felt this way, if I ever cared about anyone I ended up smashing them into the ground when we argued or scaring them because of what I was but with Loki it was different. I wanted to feel this way, i wanted to care about him and I wanted to prove that, I wanted to save him, wanted to show him the light and that I would be here every step of the way to guide him. That I wasn't going to leave his side and no matter what I would always be here to protect him no matter what struggles came our way, I would always be here for him.

I had always wanted to be isolated and alone from the world because that way I wouldn't hurt anyone, the reason Loki wanted to be alone from the world was so that no one could hurt him, I didn't want to hurt anyone and he didn't want anyone to hurt him. We were both afraid of the world for two seperate reasons, I was afraid of what i would do to people and he was afraid of the pain they would cause him, was it destined that we would have so much in common and some how find ourselves taking comfort in each other or was it just conincedential that everything that has happened the past few days had come to be? There had to be a reason that all of this has happened or maybe I should just be grateful that it did and not ask questions about it, I had found someone who knew what it was like to struggle this way, found someone who i could trust, someone who needed and wanted me to be there for him and now I was being put to the test to prove that I would never leave him, that I was going to help him in every way possible.

In time maybe we could work together to show the world that we're different then the monsters they see us as but more as people who just want to make a difference. In time maybe even Odin and Thor can see that loki isn't a monster and that he has changed, that he's good and that he didn't deserve the punishment that he was given. But what if he was welcomed back after proving them all wrong, would he still go back? Would I possibly lose him again? That was a possibility but what if he refused their offer? Would he then stay here with me hopefully?

**A/N ok I know this CH. probably sucks but please review and tell me what you think should happen all opinions are welcomed I'm sort of having writers block at this moment so REVIEW**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N Will Loki live and why hasn't Thor come to retrieve his brother? Will Loki stay with Banner or will he return home thinking that Odin has truly seen he's changed? Also I would like to thank shadowcat ninja for some great ideas and for making me feel really confident about this story.**

(Bruce)

The days went by slowly and stressful wondering if he'd live or forever sleep, he had after all lost a lot of blood when we finaly got him here but he was still breathing so maybe there was enough hope there that he'd wake up but then he'd have to face the dreaded choice of whether to stay or return home? What if Thor came for him before he woke up? How could I keep Thor from taking Loki from me? I couldn't I knew that not even Hulk was a match for the gods strength but still I would try and I would fight him, keep him from talking Loki away after all he wasn't ready to face more pain, wasn't ready to face his father's cold judgement and I doubt I could convince Thor to see what Odin has done to Loki, that he didn't deserve the punishment that he received.

It was getting late I knew that and I hadn't slept well in days but that didn't matter I wanted to stay by his side in case he woke up that way he would know that just as I had promised I was still by his side as I always would be. I heard the door open and turned to see Tony walk in.

"I'm leaving for a while you should get some rest." he said

"Where are you going?"  
"To SHIELD, they threatened Pepper and her family and if I didn't go and give them a worthy explanation of our betrayel then they would kill her. I know they wont but still I'm not taking chances. Let Jarvis watch over him and get some rest ourself, how long has it been since you last slept?"  
"A few days. But that doesn't matter I have to be here in case something changes, in case he wakes up I want to be here."

Tony came over and I felt him rest a hand on my shoulder.

"Bruce it's late get some rest. Jarvis watch over Loki and let Banner know if there's a change in anything right away don't hesitate or try any tricks this is seriouse."  
"Of course sir I'll let the doctor know of any changes right away."

"Good." he looked back at me "Get some rest Banner."

After he left I decided to trust that Jarvis would alret me and went upstairs to try and sleep though at first it was almost impossible and I found myself constently calling Jarvis for news.

"Perhaps these might help you doctor."

The desk drawer next to me opened and inside was a small bottle with my name on it and inside were sleep pills. I hated those pills they were always used against me and usually I would be mad that Tony had them or just the sight of them really but instead I was glad that they were there in my hand and I was glad to fall into darkness and not be haunted by dreams of a bloody, dying Loki in my arms or Thor taking him away. No this time Loki was happy and we were together, he had decided to stay with me never wanting to leave for he has never felt so happy before and to see him smile and so full of life it didn't matter if it was a dream or not, it was a possible future, a future that I would do anything to make true but first thing I had to do was to save him from not only death but also from his own demons but I was up for the challenge of saving him, I had saved myself after all and even though I was alone I was going to be by his side every step of the way.

When I woke up I felt calm, happy with what I had seen that night, happy that the sun was shining, happy that I had woke up before New York's streets became noisy and busy. Jarvis had nothing to report so I went and made some tea wanting to enjoy the morning while it still lasted. I went out onto the balcony and stared over the railing looking down at the few people who like myself were enjoying the quite morning but what really caught my eye was the view in front of me. The sun slowly rising over New York harbor, the light bouncing off of the windows, as the sky light up in several colors before it faded into blue. There was only one thing that would make this morning better and that was if a raven haired, emerald eye god was here by my side to enjoy this beautiful scene.

"Then perhaps you should turn around."

I knew that voice and as I turned there, leaning against the door frame was that very god.

"Loki."

I found myself almost speechless to see that he was alive and seemed well, my heart jumped with excitment to know that I had just saved someone, that I had given someone another chance at life again. He made his way over to me and leaned against the railing looking over the harbor as well, his eyes deep in concentration as they took in the scenery.

"It's truly a beautiful sight wouldn't you agree Banner?" he asked

"Yes, it's truly beautiful." cautiously I took his hand it was smooth and soft in mine and as I looked up into hie emerald eyes the world seemed to stop.

"Banner? Doctor Banner? Earth to Banner."

I opened my eyes as I heard Jarvis screaming my name, it was a dream, a day dream. Loki hadn't woken up, no if he had then Jarvis wouldn't have called me. But there was urgency in the way he called and I ran to the medical room where Loki was and I saw that his breathing was labored, heart was racing, he was sweating. He kept mumbling as though he was in a nightmare, I rushed to ease his heart-beat as well as his breathing.

"Loki it's ok I'm here, everything's ok."  
"No it's all lies!"

"Loki you're dreaming please wake up"  
"No, no, stop!"

It wasn't working he was in a heated dream and it was scaring him, I had to wake him up, I had to let him know it was all a dream, that he was safe and no one was going to hurt him again.

"Loki please it's me Bruce your friend."  
"I don't have friends!"  
"I'm your friend, please wake up."

I took his hand in mine at the movement he calmed down a bit, it was working he knew that I was really here.

"Please wake up Loki don't listen to them I'm here for you, I always will be."  
"No no there just lies."

"I'm not lying to you Loki I don't know what they're telling you but their only voices that are lying I know I battled them too. But I promise if you wake up then they'll go away because I'll be here to fight them away, I'm here to help you."

In his sleep he noded and his breathing calmed down drastically and as he opened his eyes he saw that just as I had said I was still there, still holding his hand in mine, still by his side as I told him countless times since we meet all those weeks ago.

"It's good to see you again Loki."

He looked around trying to remember where he was, confusion had taken over his face but I couldn't blame him the last place he could remember being was in that glass cell at SHIELD.

"Bruce how did I get here? Where is here?"  
"I came and got you out of SHIELD, you were bleeding really bad so me and Tony brought you here to his house to save you."  
"ANd where is Tony?"  
"He left last night to go to SHIELD to explain why we rescued you."

"You fought them to save me? Your own friends for a lowly villain?"  
"I told you that no matter where you were I would always come and save you, to protect you. I never go back on a promise no matter what it means I'll have to do in order to keep it so if I have to lose my friends to save you then that's what I'll do."

I let go of his hand and he turned his wrists over to examine the healed cuts that had caused him to bleed so much, they were now slowly dissapearing into his skin. He smiled at the sight of the wounds finally healing or maybe to know that he was still alive and at what I had done to save him. I sat down on a stool next to him as he sat up, the pain was slowly going away from his eyes and they began to sparkle under a new light, a happier light.

"You were right Bruce."  
"About what?"  
"Everything. There was a way to fight off the darkness and now I no longer hear them, I can't see any of it only where I am now and who I'm with. I like this new vision Bruce, I like it very much."  
"I'm glade to hear that."

"What news have you heard of Thor?"

I knew that sooner or latter he'd ask about Thor, he'd probably wanted to hear that he was on his way to get him and take him back to Asgard but I guess that was good because I knew that I couldn't tell him that for it wasn't true.

"I don't know. I haven't heard or seen Thor since your invasion."

His smile faded and the darkness returned.

"Oh I see." he pulled his knees in closer to him "SO they truly have forgotten me then, I am no longer welcomed there nor here."  
"That's not true Loki." I placed my hand on his shoulder "You are welcomed here maybe not everywhere on Earth yet but your welcomed here in Tony's home and your welcomed at my place too. This is a good thing that Thor hasn't been sent to take you back."  
"It is?"

"Yes it is. It means that you can start over again and I'll help you. You can show everyone that you truly have changed and that you are sorry. You can show them that your no longer the villain everyone saw you as."  
"Is such a change possible?"  
"Of course it is, I did it but i was alone. Your not alone though 'cause I'm here and I'm going to help you through it each step of the way until they all see that you have changed and maybe you can even help us?"

I knew that it sounded all to good to him and that he still didn't believe that such good things could come to him, I was the same way too but I know that once you start believeing that good is possible even for a monster such as yourself then the darkness goes away and light comes in making everything clearer and brighter. I wanted to share that light with Loki, I wanted to show him that such a change was possible and I would always be by his side to help him, to pick him back up when he fell, I was never going to leave him or abandon him like everyone else had done, no unlike them I was going to stay with him and I would never leave him alone, he desereved that much at least.

(Loki)

It didn't seem possible, I thought for sure that I was going to die in that cell, but the voices proved otherwise for dead men don't hear them or see their fears, but surly I thought that it was all a dream still that what had happened between me and Banner, all that we went through I thought for sure that this time I would find out that it was all a dream and yet I was proven wrong for as soon as I opened my eyes he was there, at my side holding my hand and though I had not admitted it at the time I liked the feeling. But surly this time he was wrong, after all how could all that good be possible for someone like me? Sure he too was a monster but his was under control, his onyl came out when he was mad unlike me who had been born a monster and was a monster every day.

Did it hurt knowing that Thor hadn't come for me? Of course I though for sure that he would come and take me back, that I would face Odin once more, and that the cycle would just repeat itself, but at the same time it was good to know that he had not come for it meant that I could spend more time here with Bruce, that I was free for a little longer. It was also good to know that I was welcomed somewhere and that Stark and Bruce had fought their own friends and possibly lost them as well just to save me, just to save another monster, no no I wasn't a monster not any more and I had to start realizing that, I had to realize that I wasn't a monster but just as human as Banner was. Bruce led my to Tony's room where I decided to calm down in the hot water, hoping to ride myself of who I was in order to start anew.

Even though I knew very well that I couldn't wash away personality it still felt nice letting the hot water run down my skin, washing away all the dirt that had collected from the many years in prison, let it wash away all my doubt, the voices, I felt cleaner as though those few minuets under the water had actually cleaned away the person I used to be. But still I couldn't help but doubt what Bruce had promised me, was it really possible for me to start again, to become a different person and show the world that I truly had changed? It just seemed to good for me to be able to gain and yet everything that he has ever promised always seems to come true in the end when it's tested the most. I wanted to change and I wanted to show all nine realms that I had changed as well and even though I was no longer a prince what did that matter, what did I care now if I wore a crown or sat on a throne? I had friends, people who cared about me, a place where I was welcomed and wanted, I had found everything that I had ever wanted to gain in one place with one man who has never abandoned me and has always came back for me, stuck by my side no matter what, was there to pull me out of the darkness and scare away the voices.

I thought back to everything that has happened to me so far from finding out the truth about my heritage, almost destroying New York, imprisonment, helping Thor defeat the elves, back to imprisonment, meeting Banner, getting taken by SHIELD, rescued by Banner, helped by Stark, taken by the Avengers, and rescued by Banner. The good doctor has helped me quit a bit since I came down to Midgard only hoping to escape for one night never thinking that one night could led to all of this, that it could led me to finding everything that I had ever actually wanted to gain all but to be seen as Thor's equal which had been my true prize but that was my poisonious dream not taking a throne and now I was ready to give up on that dream for it had caused me far to much pain to be worth the fight.

I borrowed some cloths from Stark and changed my look just a bit so that I was still Loki but there was something off that made it hard to find the hurting prince only my eyes couldn't be changed and those who truly knew me would know to look in them and see that pain there and know that the man that stood before them used to be a proud Asgardien Prince. While I trusted Banner to help me through this fight that was slowly ending I still didn't believe that he could get the Avengers to except my change as well which was still understandable but I apprecited that he thought of such a thing. When I rejoined Bruce back in the living room he knew right away that it was still me and that was good as long as he still saw me that was all that mattered, it was everyone else that I was trying to fool.

"I see you've changed a bit."

"Yes, if I'm to stay here for some time longer then I wish to be able to blend in without being attacked."  
"Smart choice. You really do look different but not to different, I like it."

He licked my change of attire, that was good I wanted to please him. I looked around the room and noticed Stark staring at me trying to piece the transformation together and I couldn't help but smile knowing that I had stumped him. But instead of trying to figure it all out he just shrugged his shoulders and got up walking over to join us.

"So what happened with SHIELD?" Bruce asked

"Not much they believe we're being controled somehow into believing that Loki's changed but I think we also have Natasha on our side the whole time she didn't look at me nor said a single word which isn't like her at all."  
"Ok so there's possibly three out of seven Avengers who believe that Loki's changed. I don't like those odds Tony." Bruce said

I didn't like them either even if the Black Widow did believe that I had changed there still wasn't enough to prove that I wasn't controling anyone, perhaps I was wrong and I wasn't going to belong here much longer not without being hunted down nor could I start over here, no I wasn't going to be free that was still a distent dream that I couldn't make real.

"Hey don't worry pal we're not going to hand you over just because the odds aren't in our favor we'll prove to them that they're wrong about you, you'll see right Bruce?"  
"Tony's right Loki we're not turning our back on you just because they don't agree with us. Like I've said a thousand times before I'm not going to leave your side, I'm going to help you through this and if that means that I make a few more enemies or lose some of my closest friends then so be it. I'm not going to let them hurt you anymore, as long as I'm here no one's going to lock you up in some cell, or torture you, or do whatever they did to you back on Asgard and if Thor comes to take you back then I'll stop him any way that I have to if you don't want to go back there and franckly I don't want you to leave. I want you to stay because I believe in you and I know that I can help you get through this."

I couldn't help but smile again it was the only way to hold back the tears.

"Thank you both I do not deserve such friends nor such kindness."  
"Hey don't mention it and I couldn't say it any better then Bruce, we've got your back and no matter what we're going to get you through this together."

_Sir you might want to leave now if you wish to meet Mrs. Potts for brunch_

"Wow would you look at the time. I wish I could stay and chat but Pepper's helping me with filling a case against SHIELD."

"Just because of what they did to Loki?"  
"Hey anyway to get money and I don't care what the public's going to say they broke in entrance, kidnapped the guy, and abandoned him in a cell where he almost killed himself, the guy hasn't caused New York any problems yet so yes I am filing a case against them for what they did and didn't they also knock you out for like three days that's lethal amount of narcotics and you could have died all because you were protecting him."

We watched Tony rush out the door to go meet his girlfriend to talk about getting back at SHIELD and the Avengers for what they did. Was this what true friends did for each other? Stick up for one another no matter what might happen? They truly did care for me and they were willing to do anything to help me through this never have I ever experienced such kindness and to think that years before these two were my enemies standing in my way of getting my rightful throne and possible to be seen as equal to Thor and now they were my only friends. I sat down and buried my face in my hands and like many times before I felt Banner sit next to me and place his hand comfortingly on my shoulder.

"I never meant for any of this to happen. I only wanted to escape it all for just one night."  
"Hey it's going to be ok I know you didn't mean for any of this to happen and yet it did but you know what I'm glade it did. I'm glade that I got to fight to protect an innocent man and I'm glade I got to become your friend."

"Always so kind and honest but is there really any hope for me at all?"

"Of course there is. There's hope for everyone no matter who they used to be just as long as their willing to change is all that matters."  
"What if I don't want to?"

Of course I wanted to change, I didn't want to be seen as this monster anymore. I didn't want to have to hid in fear or be hunted down, I wanted people to like me again. Yet I hadn't completely escaped the darkness and that questioned stuck in the back of my mind, what if I didn't want to change? What if I wanted to stay like this after all I couldn't really hurt anyone anymore only myself and by being alone no one could hurt me in return. But as I looked into Bruce's eyes there was understanding as if he saw my reasons for asking such a strange question even after I already proved that I wanted to change.

"It's up to you but if that is what you want to do then I'm always here if you need someone or change your mind but I think that you really do want to change and it is possible."

They'll be back wont they? THey always come back."

"SHIELD and the Avengers? Yes they'll keep coming back until they see that we were right as for the voices they will return once in a while but eventually they just give up all together."  
"Is such a bliss possible for me though? After everything that I had done and all that I've gone through I doubt even I can get ride of them."  
"Don't doubt so much Loki I think everything so far that you've doubted I've proven can be possible."

Of course he was right all that I had doubted such as him not reaching me in time, not caring, not being able to find happiness or freedom from it all and I had found all of that. I had found a friend, comfort, joy, and no matter where I was taken Banner came shortly after to save me even after I had tried to kill myself he was there and he held me comfortingly, didn't leave my side and was there to wake me from my nightmare bringing me back into the world. Then there was this feeling inside of me, I couldn't quit name it for it felt so foriegn and yet familiar at the same time but it hurt to feel this way as if the last time I did something terrible happened and I could never feel this again.

_Then am I not your mother?_

Now I remember, I felt this for the only person who had kept me alive for so long, the only person who cared for me.

_You're not_

It was I who had given up on her because of everything that I had been lied to about.

_You might want to take the stairs on the right_

It was I who had killed her. Killed the only person who had kept me alive, cared for me, I didn't mean for her to die and yet she did.

_Your mother is dead_

_"__You killed her"_

_"__What a monster"  
"What else could be expected"  
_I didn't mean to

_"__Does that matter now?"  
"Of course not because you killed her"  
"Your own mother"  
"The only one to care for you"_

That wasn't suppose to happen, she was suppose to live and I should have died during that war, she should have been alive and it should have been me to die, left in that barren land.

"_You can't even die correctly"  
"What a waste of space you are"  
"Pathetic"  
"How can you even claim to be of Asgard"  
"No wonder Laufey didn't want you"_

_"__You'll never belong anywhere"_

No, no, no just shut up just go away. I covered my ears again hoping that would shut them out but no they only got louder and louder screaming at me.

_"__YOUR WORTHLESS"_

_"__PATHETIC"  
"NO ONE WANTS YOU"  
"JUST DIE ALREADY"_

No please just shut up already, shut up and leave me alone. But there it was again, that strong comforting hand.

"Loki?"

All I could do was shake my head as I tried to stand, shaking and almost in tears. I hated being so weak but they were right, I had killed her, just all the others that I killed, I was a monster down to the core and no one would ever want me but then there was Banner who had stuck to my side for so long proving to me that no matter how many times I said it he always came back, always stayed by my side, always cared about when no one else did. But was it safe to feel again? TO show such compassion in return when that very compassion had killed the only one to truly love me back, what if in turn I ended up killing Bruce? No I couldn't feel this way not ever again, I didn't want anyone else to die not by or for me it wasn't worth to have another persons life layed heavy on my heart reminding me of all the terrible sins I had already done, the very reason I had to freeze this heart and never use it again, I couldn't let anyone in completely and yet I wanted to, I wanted to let my heart feel again and I wanted it to feel the very warmth and comfort I felt from Bruce.

However if I was going to change perhaps I should allow myself to care again, it could help me become more human maybe to know that I could care and that I wasn't coldblooded or heartless but that was another thing I was scared of. I was scared of letting people in in fear that they'd only see weakness and then leave me there hurting even more. That they'd use that against me and I had already gone through so much pain already that I didn't want to go through any more. Bruce slide of the couch and sat next to me putting his arms tighter around me and all I could do was return the gesture and hide my face in his shoulder not wanting to let go in fear of losing him as well. This comfort, this friendship between us was all that I had left and I would do anything to not lose that too, I wanted to keep this, keep this warmth that I felt for it was a beautiful thing that ignited a fire within the cold and darkness opening my eyes to the light for the first time in forever.

"It'll be ok Loki I wont let go. I'll be here for forever just for you and no one else."  
Tears had brimmed my eyes and began to lightly fall.

"Bruce I must admit that I am afraid. Afraid of losing you and this friendship that we share."  
"You wont lose anything more Loki I'm never leaving no need to worry about that."  
"Yes..I know but still I fear at what's to come if all goes as planned."  
"The future? I don't know what's going to happen." we pulled apart but he kept his hands on my shoulders "But I do know that just like now we'll still be here and you'll be happy no longer knowing pain that's a promise that I'm willing to make and fight for if that'll mean you'll stay here as well."

I pulled him in close and leaned my forhead against his and gazed into those deep eyes of his, memorized by the light inside of them.

"Of course I'll stay."


	7. Chapter 7

(Bruce)

I didn't like seeing Loki so hurt it pained me every time he hid his face, started shaking, crying, it pained me to see what has become of the god I last saw. There was no connection between the two. The old god was dangerous, didn't care, crazy, insane, but Loki..he was gentle, caring, lonely, scared, I couldn't see that insane monster that I last fought in him now. His eyes was the most that changed, before they glowed emerald with hunger for power but now they were softer, more compassionet and they craved to belong and feel wanted. He only wanted to leave it all behind him and change who had become, he wanted to be different to know that he was just as human as everyone else.

As he leaned his head in close and our foreheads touched I could feel a slight chill and slightly shuttered under the sudden frost but it felt different then usual cold. This chill was warm and full of care, it made me feel happy and it was a new feeling. As I gazed into his bright emerald eyes I saw comfort and joy in them as though he was glad that I was the one that was there in front of him and not someone else, they were glad that they had found another set that cared and knew the pain. I cared greatly about Loki and to hear him say that he wasn't going to leave made me smile to know that he wanted to stay here, wanted to be by my side, that he wanted me to stay there by his as well. But I was worried by this feeling, it has only led me to hurt those I felt this way towards until I was left alone and broken because all I could do was hurt them, I couldn't care, couldn't be gentle, but that wasn't me that was Hulk and he was my own sin.

I wanted to be able to care like this again, wanted to show someone that I truly could care, that I could be gentle with such a feeling and Loki was the only one I felt this way about. I wanted to prove myself to him, wanted to do everything that I had promised him I would as if that would show him my own feelings towards the God. Yet whenever I gazed into him my heart beated with this feeling sending warmth throughout my body and all I wanted was to care, wanted to act upon such a strong feeling but I knew that with Loki I would have to be patient. he had been hurt far to often by to many people and I knew that trust wasn't something he was comfortable giving so to know that he trusted me was a great step and now all I had to do was wait until he felt ready to trust me further and I was willing to wait as long as it took. I didn't want to hurt him in any way or make him feel un-comfortable so I would wait, and hope that time would be merciful just this once to us both.

The day went by very slowly and both of us seemed to be on edge every now and then jumping at the slightest noise hoping that it wasn't the Avengers, Thor, or SHIELD. I never left Loki's side throughout the day, we just stayed in the living room sitting on the couch together not daring to leave or to be away from each other.

"Is it really possible? TO try and convince them."  
"Of course it is it's just going to take some time is all but eventually they'll see that your different and then everything will be better."  
"What do you plan to do should Thor come for me? When he's determined there's usually nothing that can stop him."  
"Yeah I know the guys strong but I think I can take him. After all I did break into SHIELD twice and beat down all their guards just to save you I think I can take on Thor."  
He laughed sarcastically not believing that I could on Thor and I knew very well that I couldn't but just to hear him laugh again was incredible and it was beautiful as well the way he threw his head back, the smile on his face, to see all the pain leave for a moment. I felt as though I had acomplished a miracle in itself by making him laugh.

"You are very funny Banner but I fear it will take more then wit to take down Thor." he held up his hand as a tinge of blue tainted his skin "However I've sparred against my brother enough to have a few tricks of my own."

His eyes filled with sadness again as the tinge of blue started to make it's way up his arm but maybe the sadness was also from remembering the past back when maybe he was happier.

"What if he doesn't come though?" I asked

"Then it will be better for us both should he not come for me. It will be less painful that way."  
There it was again, that dreaded word that had done so much damage to us both. It was now our enemy as well as our own worse fear, afraid to feel pain, afraid to hurt, afraid of having to go through it all again. Something I had overcome already but something that continued to haunt Loki, something that was on a different magnitude to him then the basic definition of the word. I knew that he hated it more then anything in the universe possible even more then his captors or the very man that had put him there. I couldn't understand how Loki's father could put him through so much pain and not even care at all what happened to him, it seemed cruel and unthinkable to do. Sure the guy killed 80 people and almost destroyed New York and I could understand that he needed to be punished but was what he went through for the best?

"Loki what happened after Thor took you back to Asgard? What did they do to you?"

His hand dropped as did his gaze and the pain returned mixing with the sadness, I didn't want to ask him such a troubling question but I felt like I had to know just what happened, to know what I had helped make possible, what I had put him through.

"I'm sorry for asking you such a morbid question it's just that..."  
"Do not apologize Banner it is quit alright for I knew that sooner or latter you would wish to know the truth about my punishment. There are two prisons on Asgard, one underneath the palace where most of the prisoners captured in war are held however there is another that is cloacked in the darkness on the dark side of Asgard and that is where the more dangerous go, those who's punishment requires such a hidden place to make it more secrete." he concentrated deeper in thought forcing himself to remember "I was taken to the lower vaults where it was darkest and hardly anyone was kept there unless your truly a great threat. It seemed like every few hours the gaurds would return and as I laid chained to the stone wall, weak, helpless, the took great pleasure in tormenting me in every way possible they didn't care if the broke me, didn't care how much blood I lost, just as long as they could have the pleasure of destroying me, destroying all confidence, they took everything from me that I had. Sometimes they threw poison at me, bound me and left me in the coldest months in Joutinhiem, everything they could think to make me suffer they did and during those years even my powers began to deminish." he began to shiver greatly at the thought of all he had gone through "But that was only the beginning, after spending about sixteen mortal years there my mother finally learned of my punishment and conivenced Odin to stop such madness and I was moved to a cell in the other prison though it made no difference for the guards there were just as ruthless with their own sick imitations of torture." tears fought to brim his eyes as he continued to shake closing his eyes. I didn't want to hear any more, I didn't want him to remember any more either for it was clearly bothering him . As I wrapped my arm around him as I knew he liked he rested his head on my shoulder terrified of those years.

"I'm sorry Loki I had no idea."

"It is alright...Banner...I j..just never thought it would end."

We had made a terrible mistake of letting Thor take Loki back even if back then I was Loki's enemy if I had known that this was his punishment even then I would ahve been against letting him suffer in such a way it was cruel and brutal. As he told me what had happened I could feel the chains, the whips, the bitter cold, the tears, and heart ache, screaming for it all to end, to have mercy and kill me there. I was amazed that he had gone through all those years of such torment and still managed to live, still managed to stand. But those years had damaged him, they had taken everything from him and left him broken and shattered. I could feel my own heart shatter at the tale, at the pain, at knowing that this was his fate but it also gave me new purpose of proving to him that everything would be ok, of proving to him that there was hope for freedom and that I would never let him go no matter what.

I felt him return the hug and there we sat wrapped in each others arms holding on tightly afraid to let go and lose each other and lose this comfort and warmth. As the day slowly came to an end there was still no sign of Tony but I really didn't care where he was or what he was doing, I didn't care if he didn't return until next week I just wanted to be here with Loki, I wanted to protect him and as long as he was here and as long as he knew that nothing was going to hurt him that was all that mattered, as long as he was making this journey to recover from all that had happened then I didn't care about the rest of the world, I only had time for Loki.  
"It's alright Loki you'll never have to go back there. I swear they'll never hurt you again."  
"Why do you make such a hard promise to keep?"  
"Because it's a promise I intend to keep you'll see Loki."

His arms dropped from around me but his head remained on my shoulder and I kept one of my arms around him protectively. I would do everything that I had to to keep Thor from taking Loki back and I would fight to the death to keep Loki safe, no one was going to hurt him, no one was going to take him from my side I don't care how many soldiers from Asgard come to take him back I'll stop them all before I let any of them take him away from me.

"You know they'll keep coming until they have me captured and sent away." he whispered

"Of course but even if they send you back to Asgard I'll find some way in and I'll save you no matter who tries to stop me."  
"You are a brave man Banner but even if you could get into Asgard it will be hard to get me out."  
"I don't care how hard it is I swear I'll always save you no matter where you are taken."

(Loki)

_'__Give up this poisonous dream and come home brother'_

No Thor I don't want to

_'__You will come home and face your punishment'_

No please I haven't done anything wrong

_'__You left us worried who knows what damage you were about to cause'_

I wasn't going to no please I want to stay

_'__There's no place for you here monster'_

_'__Yes just leave you freak'_

_'__Who would ever care about you?'_

"Loki wake up."

I opened my eyes, breathing hard, sweating, a lamp turned on and at my side was Banner like all the times before he was there to wake me from such nightmares and I always felt better waking to see him there with worry in his eyes and a comforting hand resting upon my shoulder. He cared, he said it many times in many different ways, they were wrong I knew he wanted me here, I knew he cared.

"Are you alright?"  
"Yes, I am now thank you for your concern."

He smiled and got up to leave but I caught his hand not wanting the warm gesture gone and he stopped walking away.

"Please stay."

It was strange to ask such a thing but when he was around I always felt better, happier knowing that while he was there I was truly safe, he wouldn't let anyone hurt me anymore and I never heard them when he was there it was a bliss that I enjoyed. He pulled up a chair and as I closed my eyes once more I felt his hand take hold of mine as the same feeling of warmth and comfort raced down my veins and I knew that I could finally relax.

I feel into the darkness once more but this time I woke to a different scene, before me was no cell, no guards, no torment no instead I was back at Banners' house and he was there right beside me still holding my hand as he always did with light twinkling in his eyes. I had a new feeling inside of me, it was warm and gentle and it made me happy, made me wish it would never go away, that I would always have it inside of me reminding me that I could feel, that I did have a heart, that it was possible for me to change.

I didn't want to believe it didn't want to admit it but I knew the reason for why my heart beat like this, why I felt the way I did, I cared for the very man that was sitting by my side, the man that had risked so much for me, who had showed me that everything I doubted was possible that there was hope and that someone did care about me.

_'I would break into Asgard and I would save you.'_

_'I don't care who tries to stop me I'll stop them all just to save you'_

He really did care but was it the same way that I cared for him? What if he was doing all of this out of good nature and only cared for me as a friend? Oh what a fool I was for thinking that there could possibly have been more between us then just our sins and friendship I truly believed that there could be more to us, if only I hadn't lost my power to read peoples minds then I could see for myself how he truly thought of me and then would I be at rest knowing that he saw me only as a friend or possibly as something more. When I woke the first thing I saw was Banners eyes, staring down at me still so full of light and that warmth returned inside only to die as I wondered what he really thought of me but as much as I wanted to ask him I couldn't bring myself to ask the question.

He smiled and left me to get dressed the whole time my dream of last night ran through my head, him waking me from my nightmare, to dreaming of a peacful day next to him by ourselves with no worries about our enemies or being seperated, to waking up to see he was still there just as he had promised he would be. What was I thinking in the first place? Why would he ever care for me the same way I did for him? What reason did he have for wanting me even still here? I had to stop this, had to stop feeling or else I was going to end up broken again and this time I would have nothing for it would be my heart that shatters.

Yet he had promised me so much and the way he looks at me, the way he comforts me surly that has to be some sort of sign that there could be more to us and if there wasn't then maybe I was better off back home at least there no one could hurt me again, I could spend all day in my room and no one would ever care or notice that I dissapeared from the world I doubt it was even Thor who discovered I was missing, but then if it wasn't him then who else?

_'Loki I want to help you'_

Ah yes it had to be Lady Sif the last person to see me that night before I left, the last person to show any signs of care for me there. But not even Sif could drag me back to Asgard even if Banner saw me as nothing more then friends then I would be content with just that as long as I could stay here. As I entered the living room Stark ran out past me in a hurry to go somewhere which I was not surprised to see at all. I didn't care much for what Stark did at all only Banner mattered to me. As I looked around trying to find him my eyes caught on the scene outside for snow was lightly falling covering everything in a sheet of white. Could I finally stand out there without feeling pain?

Even though I had nothing but jeans on the snow felt soft and warm against my skin that was no taking a tinge of blue but it was that change that suddenly brought the pain. I could feel the bounds wrap around my hands and feet as I fell to the ground in pain, the same pain that I felt all those years in prison. I screamed hoping that would make a difference but I doubted it would for it seemed like not many people were out in the streets during such weather, I was alone in the bitter cold in pain, the world fadded away and all I saw around me was the snowy plane of Joutenhiem and I could feel the metal bounds harden and freeze against my skin which was now completely blue with the silver lines of a frost giant, revealing the true monster that crawled beneath my skin, the true monster of my heritage that had made me do all that I had done and even though it was this very monster that had saved my life from freezing it was still the very being that I was trying so desperetly to escape but I knew that if Banner saw me in such a form he too would come to see that I'm nothing more then this aweful monster and wouldn't want me around anymore.

"Somebody please help!" I found myself scream again not expecting anyone in Joutenhiem to hear me after all they were gone and even if there were some giants left they wouldn't help me they'd rather see me suffer and die as well.

"Loki."

I heard it the sound of worry and fear in someone's voice but who could be here? Surly no giant for the voice was much smaller, nor from Asgard for it was forbidden to return here (unless by punishment).

"Loki please wake up."

I opened my eyes to see Bruce kneeling in front of me with his arms wrapped around me protectivly as they always were. After remembering where I was I no longer felt the pain or the bounds but I did back away from Banner more in fear of what he was going to say about my true form but instead he just sat there saddened that I had backed away so quickly from him in fear.

"Loki."

"No get away from me I'm a freak."  
"No your not Loki."

He came closer to me and grasped my hand in his, I didn't understand the gesture until I saw my skin turn back to normal at his touch.

"See your human just like me we both have monsters inside."

I stopped backing away and he took both of my hands in his and the blue tinge to my skin quickly faded away, he held on to me tightly and after a moment when he let go my skin was no longer blue nor did it change blue again and then did I feel the frost of the snow, it wasn't a bitter pain like before but it was chilling and only then was I glad of my true form for when it came out I could withstand any cold but without it I was freezing to the very bone. Banner helped me inside and handed me a nearby blanket which was very warm and soft.

"What were you thinking?" he asked with a slight laugh

"I wondered if I would feel the pain again from all those years or if I had truly overcame it sadly I was terribly wrong."  
He came over and sat down next to me setting to hot cups down on the table.

"This is why I try not to leave you alone. You hurt when I'm gone and I promised you that you wouldn't hurt anymore."

"Yes I do recall you making that promise to me."

He placed his arm around me and as if it was natural I leaned against him resting my head upon his shoulder wrapping the blanket tighter around me. Bruce felt warm and soft and I snuggled in closer to him for it was a warmth that I longed to feel everytime he was next to me and wanted to feel when he was not. It was a warmth that I had never felt before until the first time Banner had comforted me and ever since then I always wanted to feel this warmth run through me, as I closed my eyes again I smiled gently and heard Banner laugh.

"You've changed so much Loki I like the new you."  
I felt his hand rub against my arm and I liked the feeling I looked up and our eyes locked on one another as the room feel silent. They were so mesmorizing, so beautiful, I felt my heart race and my skin warm up at the sight. He was such a beautiful person everything about him was perfect and I couldn't have wished to be gazing at any other being besides Banner.


	8. Chapter 8

(Banner)

I meet his gaze and was trapped right away by their piercing emerald green, the way the shone in the low light of the room, my heart beat a little faster as it always did when I was next to him. His face all together was perfect, his skin was smooth, eyes an entriguing green, his cheeks slightly pale, his lips...They sat perfectly as if waiting for something new, something different to happen. My blood began to boil in my skin and I couldn't pull away, couldn't take my eyes off of his.

(Loki)

Why did Banner's eyes have to be so beautiful? Why must they shine brighter then any star in the sky? I felt myself move closer to him, not being able to stop or pull back, it was as if his eyes were pulling me in closer inviting me to have a closer look.

(Banner)

The gap between us was slowly beginning to close and my heart began to race faster and faster.

(Loki)

I don't know if I was afraid of what was to follow should this gap close completely or if I wanted this just as much as he. I trusted Banner with everything that I had and the only thing I ever had was my very heart which now beat faster and faster.

(Banner)

We were getting closer together and I thought my heart would stop. I closed my eyes as did he and we leaned in closer prepaired to close the gap.

(Loki)

I watched Banner close his eyes and closed mine as well waiting the moment to feel the gap gone and to feel nothing more then a new type of warmth and care.

"Hey guys...I got...Bad news!"  
We pulled away quickly as Stark came running in, damn it Stark you couldn't have waited a few more minuets before rushing in. By the time he found us in the living room it had looked as though nothing had happened between me and Banner, I was still wrapped in the blanket but Banner's arm was no longer around me and he sat a little more distant then usual.

"What is it Stark?" I asked with as much irritation as I could

"I just...saw Thor and the others...outside coming this way."

So he did come after all. I thought I would be happy at hearing such news but now it was to late and I hated knowing that Thor was here, hated knowing that he would drag me back to Asgard, hated knowing that I would no longer see Banner. I knew freedom was a lie, it was something that I would never have and now the fates had played a cruel card against me seperating me from the very man I now loved and didn't want to leave and yet here Thor was to do just that. I looked over at Banner but when he looked at me his eyes held that familiar brightness that reminded me that everything was going to be ok.

"We can't let him take Loki away Tony we have to stop them."

Banner had moved closer and I only realized this by his arm suddenly around me protectingly and after a moment Tony understood adn nodding his head he went back out to try and stop them from coming back and taking me away. I rested my head once again on Banners shoulder, I didn't want to go back, I didn't ever want to leave Banner but I knew that Thor would never understand why I didn't want to go back to that place he called 'home' that wasn't what it was it was a prison, a palace made of cells used for torture it would never bee called 'home' to me. This however was, here I felt safe, warm, protected and wanted, here was where I wanted to stay for the rest of my life with Banner. I felt tears fight to brim my eyes at the thought of losing all that I had just gained, thought of the torture I would have to endure, I thought about all that I would have to go through before I could return.

"Hey don't cry it'll be ok I swear Thor's not going to take you away not if Hulk and I have anything to say about it."  
"My brother will not reason with you Banner. No doubt Odin has told him some lie to make him determined enough to hunt for me and now that he's found me..."

I buried my head in his shoulder not wanting him to see the tears that slowly streaked my face at the thought of facing Odin or hearing what lie he spun this time into Thor's mind. But Banner lifted my chin and wiped the tears away smiling as though nothing wrong was going to happen, as though Thor really wasn't here he wasn't even nervous to face Thor at all. Looking down at his hands I saw a familiar tinge of green but it didn't move it just lightly streaked his fists, he was mad, mad that Tony had ruined a lovely moment, mad at Thor for coming, mad at them all for what they have done these past few weeks. The green hue comforted me knowing that all that has happened did make him mad and that he was going to give them all a piece of his mind, yet at the same time it was strange knowing that Hulk was now going to protect me that he was going to fight for me and not against me like he did when I tried to conquer New York.

The door downstairs opened but did not close so I knew it wasn't Tony, then there were the heavy footsteps quickly coming up the stairs, it was those feet that had scared me and I quickly ran into the shadows of the far corner and hide myself in the most powerful invisibility spell that I knew, I didn't care how much strength and energy I would lose by preforming such a spell I would do whatever I had to not get discovered giving Banner all the time he needed to redirect Thor away from here.

"Good friend Banner who are you today."

Thor had made his way into the living room where Banner now sat where I had moments before wrapped in the very blanket as snow fell heavier outside.

"I'm doing fine Thor and how about yourself?"  
"I am in search of my brother Loki, he has left Asgard for much time and I wish to bring him home have you seen him?"

Banner looked up at an angle thinking, he was acting as though he knew nothing and it was really good acting.

"Sorry Thor I haven't seen him anywhere. Which I could help but I don't know where Loki could be he's not in New York."  
"Thank you good friend however I would kindly appreciate it if you would please stop lying to me I love Loki very much and wish to take him home."

"I know Thor and I would love it if you did take him back to Asgard that way he wouldn't be able to cause anyone any trouble but like I already said I don't know where he is."  
"Then what reason have you to be here in the Man of Iron's home?"  
"We're working on a science experiment for Clint's arrows. We're hoping to make them explode much bigger causing more damage."

"Again please stop lying."

This time Banner didn't say anything I should have known that by now Thor could easily detect a lie I was the master of lie's that's what I was known for, Loki the god of mishchief and lie's. Thor eagerly searched the room trying to detect me and as his eyes fell upon the corner in which I hid I momentarily stopped breathing and covered my mouth to prevent me from making any noise. His eyes then looked past me and he continued to search the room.

"Please come out of hiding brother I wish to take you home I miss you and Asgard is lonely without you there even if your not causing trouble I miss the silence of your room knowing that you are still there, still well."  
I didn't care what Thor said, I didn't care how he said it I didn't want to leave Midgard, I wanted to stay here with Banner. I wanted to keep this thing we shared this warmth and safety that I couldn't get anywhere else but here. It was something that I had searched for for my whole life and only now when I needed it desperatly did I finally find it.

"Loki please come out or I shall have to hurt Banner and I do not wish for that." he began to swing Mjolnir and I heard the air outside crackle as lighting began to form in the clouds.

"Wait what?" Banner said scared of what Thor was playing at

"I am sorry Banner but I know my brother has changed greatly over the years. If I must hurt you to make him come out of hiding then I will do so."

Banner held up his hands as if in surrender "Wait Thor just think about this for a moment ok. I'm Hulk I beat up Loki the last time he was here would it make sense that he would be here?"  
"I care not for Loki's reasoning but I sense that he is indeed here in which means that he has indeed come to you for help but I will take him home and leave you to be free of his mischief."  
"Thor seriously think about what you're doing here. Think about what could happen lets just say that Loki is here and you strike me with lightning there are a few things that could happen. One I could go Hulk and smash you into the ground like I did with Loki or two I could Hulk out and if I didn't manage to hurt you the first time we could possibly destroy New York...again."

"That is why I have not hurt you yet I know that Loki will come out and when he does then we will take leave and I will make sure he does not come back to hurt you."  
"Who says he's hurt me?"

"Loki end this madness and come home."

What was Thor doing? He knew that if he angered Banner any more then he would have to face Hulk and I had no intentions of giving up my hiding spot but it was becoming clear that Thor was seeing right through my disguise.

"Loki please no more illusions I do not like threatening you nor Banner." he came towards me "Please come home."

He reached out his hand and I felt it rest on my shoulder but it was a foriegn hand and I didn't like his touch only Banner could do that, I only liked it when he rested his hand on my shoulder because it was soft and comforting but Thor's was strong and rough far to comanding. I slipped past him which was a mistake but what else was I suppose to do? Thor aimed Mjolnir and lightning streaked past me almost hitting Banner but I made another mistake and ran in front of the bolt letting it strike me instead. I've only been hit by lightning from Thor only once before and that was when we were younger and that was by accident and now this had become a personal battle. My spell dissapered and I sat on my knees hunched over as electricity surged through me. It hurt but I still stood in front of Banner protecting him as he has done countless time for me in the past.

"Loki what are you doing?" Banner asked

"Thor if you wish to drag me back to hell then fight me but I will not allow you to hurt Banner. Not after all that he has done for me."  
"Loki?"

"Do not worry Bruce this is only my repayment for the kindness you have shown me. Like I said before I've sparred with Thor countless times I will not allow him to hurt you."

His hand found my shoulder and he smiled, nodded, and moved out of our way.

"Loki what is this trickery?" Thor asked

"No tricks brother I wish to have a simple reason to be dragged back to that place and if that reason is for fighting you then so be it but no one will hurt Bruce not because of me."  
The invisibility spell had taken much of my power but I still had enough to fight Thor and if that meant using simple spells then that's what I would do. I had read every book on magic that exsisted in Asgard and I knew all the spells, I had the upper hand still and even if I lacked most of my proper strength in the art that didn't mean that I couldn't hold myself up in a fight.

"I do not wish to fight you brother."  
"Or course you do for if you didn't then you wouldn't have come, wouldn't have tried to take me away or hurt Banner. All of those things have inquired that you do intend to fight me."

My hands took on a tinge of blue and where surrounded by an emerald green glow, I was determined to fight this battle and I was going to win I don't care if it kills me afterward just as long as I get the point clear to Thor that I wasn't going back no matter what and I sure as hell wasn't going to leave Banner. Spell after spell I cast giving Thor almost no room to attack or block my flurry of spells. Some he did manage to block with Mjolnir but they would bounce of the walls or break something I had to put up a protective shield around Banner so that he wouldn't get hurt, that costed me more energy but I didn't care I didn't want him to get hurt.

"Loki this is madness please just stop this at once."  
"No Thor not until I've won and you see that I am never going back."  
"What purpose do you have in staying here I am sure the good Banner does not wish for you to stay here and trouble him."

I stopped for a moment, it was the very words that they kept repeating that I wasn't wanted here, that I was just causing trouble and Thor took this oppertunity to strike back but I couldn't get my footing to defend myself I was to taken back by those words.  
"Loki fight him he doesn't know the truth but you do and so do I please you said you wouldn't leave."

I looked over at Bruce adn fear had taken over his eyes, it was the very fear and pain that had haunted mine for eternity. I didn't like that look and I wanted to wipe it away, wanted to destroy it from his very eyes so that once more I could see them shine. I turned back towards Thor and struck back pushing him off of me, Bruce was right Thor didn't know what ahd happened these past days and he didn't know what was between me and Banner. But I knew, I knew what had happened and it was the very thing that I was fighting for. I found new strength upon hearing Banner speak up and once more attacked Thor with as many spells as I could.

"Brother what is the cause of this new found strength?" Thor asked almost out of breath

"I have something worth the fight and I will not lose for that very reason."

"That's my Loki." I heard banner whisper adn I was filled with great joy upon hearing them, that's right I was his and I wanted nothing more in the nine realms then to stay here with him. The battle continued but whether it was intended or not somehow Thor had managed to push our battle outside into the freezing chill of the snow.

"Loki!" Banner cried

The memories flooded back, the scene turned to Jotunheim but this time Thor was there and so were the guards. They all had chains and I could feel those chains wrap around me as I continued to fight as seeering pain ran through me but I was still going to fight and I was going to win.

"You knew all along didn't you?"

"Of course I did and I do not wish to hurt you in such a way but you must come home."

He knew of what the frost meant to me now, it was no longer a protective barrier or my past but it was now a form of torture that I had endured for years and Thor was using my punishment against me, he was trying to hurt me, he wanted to hurt me and it was working. I notice my skin turning blue again, felt the searing pain run through m viens, I was losing strength, losing power. I couldn't take all of the pain and I began to fall to my knees.

"Loki!"

"Shut up Banner I did not want to use such means but it is best if he leaves Midgard and does no more harm."

I was losing strength as Thor came over and I felt the cold familiar chains bind me once more but I was to weak to try and free myself, I was losing consiouness but in my last amount of strength I looked over at Banner.

"I'm sorry." I whispered

"I'll save you Loki."

No he wouldn't not this time.

(Banner)

What the hell was Thor doing? Loki practically begged not to be taken back and even though Thor knew what the falling snow could do to Loki he used it against him, against his own brother. I saw my skin begin to completely turn green and I didn't care both of us were angry at what Thor was doing and we wouldn't just sit here and do nothing.

"Thor I'm warning you leave Loki here."  
"You do not frighten me Banner Loki will no longer trouble you. He will return home."  
That place wasn't home, it was a torture cell to Loki and I wouldn't let him go through all of that pain again.

"You don't understand Thor I made him a promise, a promise we intend to keep."

My skin turned green and I felt myself change into that terrible monster that had frightened New York several times.

"Put Loki back puny god."

Thor turned around to face his new opponent, I've tried to fight Thor before and it didn't go to well but that was then and now I had a better reason to fight the god, I had to save Loki had to keep my promise to him. I was going to prove to him that freedom was possible and nothing was going to hurt him any more but I couldn't do that if he was taken back to that cell that had tortured him for so long.

"I do not wish to fight anymore Banner..."  
I didn't give him time to finish before I picked him up and just like I did to Loki I slamned him repeatidely into the ground flinging him cnostently into the walls and floor. For a moment he laid in the floor before getting up.

"Hulk no want Loki gone. Loki stay."

Thor got up and put all his strength into the fight, btu the electricty that ran through my veins was nothing just mere pricks here and there, I wasn't going to let him take Loki away not after finding such comfort and safety, not after all that I had gone through to protect him, and especially not after the feelings we shared for each other. I was going to keep my promise and i was going to save Loki one way or another. I took a few more punches at Thor and as he stood he wiped blood away from his lip, fire was raging in his eyes.

"I see that you are serious good friend but never the less Loki belongs in Asgard."  
"Loki belong here! Here Loki stay!"  
I ran at him but I misinterpruted the smirk on the gods face for as soon as I struck he lodged a needle in my shoulder and pulling it out did I realize what he had injected me with. I began to turn back to normal and I fell to the floor.

"I did not want to use such means against you doctor but Loki will not be staying with you. He is coming home."

I slipped into darkness as he walked past me to get Loki, I had to stay awake though I had to fight if I let Thor walk away with Loki then that was it, I would never see him again, would never be able to set him free, to show him true compassion, I would never hear his laugh or see his eyes sparkle in the light, would never be able to hold him tight, or wake him from a nightmare. I would never be able to do any of that or to truly act upon my feelings for the god, I had to fight, I had to stay strong for Loki.

"J.a. .. ." I said with the last amount of strength and then I heard it, the alrams, the sirens, Jarvis went crazy alerting everyone that there was trouble at Stark tower but I knew that if they came they wouldn't see what the problem was for Thor would be walking away with Loki, but Tony would know the problem, he would fight he had to fight he was the only one left that knew the truth about Loki, he was the only one left who could fight for the gods freedom.

**A/N Reviews are always welcomed. Will Tony come to the rescue? Will Banner be able to free Loki? Or is it all over?**


	9. Chapter 9

(Bruce)

I don't know how long I was nocked out for but when I woke I saw familiar faces staring down in worry. There was Steve, Clint, Natasha, and Tony but I didn't see Thor and for a second I didn't know why until the battle the had just happened moments before raced through my mind and I remembered everything that had happened. I looked hopefully at Tony who looked at everyone else and as they all left he knelt next to me.

"You didn't save him did you?" I asked sitting up

"I'm sorry Bruce, they were gone when we got here." that was it then, "but I explained to everyone what was going on." he added hopefully

That no longer mattered, it was over, he was gone and I was never going to see him again, I was never going to keep my promise, never hear him laugh, see him smile or see his eyes light up. I hid my face in my hands dissapointed in how far I came to lose it all just like every other time I was left hurt, I shouldn't have let my heart feel, shouldn't have gotten so close but I loved him and I wanted to save him that was all. Tony sat next to me and placed a hand on my shoulder but I pushed it off I didn't like his touch, it was strong and firm not like Loki's which were smooth, soft, and full of care.

"There's still a way to save him."

"How?" I looked up at him

Tony stood and held out his hand unsure of what was going to happen I took it and he led me to his lab. I didn't see why he brought me here after all I had seen every project he had been working on and knew the lab perfectly all except for the sealed, black case which he was leading me towards. He pushed a button and as the black case fell surrounded by a clear case was a small, blue, square and I knew right away what I was looking at.

"Is that the..."  
"The tesseract? Yeah it's a part of it. Before Thor took Loki back to Asgard the last time they were here I asked for a small sample for...research. Anyways I played around with it for a while and I think that I've made an accurate replica that should work."  
I didn't care about how uncertain Tony was I might have found a way into Asgard and I had a new hope, everything that I had promised Loki I could still keep. I oculd still save him, prove to him how much I care for him, he could start again here in New York and I'd help him fit in, help him start again, just the two of us.

"Than you Tony."  
He nodded and I reached out to touch the cube,I was going to save Loki no matter what I had to go through. No one was going to hurt him again and no one was going to keep us apart, not ever again.

(Loki)

My body ached everywhere, my head hurt, and I couldn't move. The ground beneath me was hard and stiff and as my senses came to me I slowly opened my eyes fearing of knowing where I was even though I knew all a long that I would wind up back here, back in this cell, in the darkness surrounded by crude silence, bound in gagged in chains preventing my from using my powers. What hurt the most was my heart, it beat slowly and with each beat it pained as though a knife had been longed into it and it was being pulled in half. I wanted to cry, cry from the pain of my heart and of what had happened over the past few weeks. Those had been some of the best days I've ever had and now they were gone and I would never see Banner again that much I knew.

Odin would make sure that I never left, that I suffered for the rest of my days and no one would come to save me, Banner had no hope for finding a way up to Asgard for I doubt even Thor would allow him to come. I would be alone forever, locked up here, tortured, it was all one big cycle that was repeating itself again. Struggling against the chains I sat up straight and leaned against the cell wall looking into the darkness.

_Hello old friend it's been a while since last time_

I sighed already wishing that I was dead, that Banner hadn't saved me from SHIELD or that the Avengers had let me fall to my death, I would much rather die now then go through with what was going to happen next.

_But then we wouldn't get to play with our favorite toy_

_Yes what fun's that if your dead_

_Dead man can't feel pain so there would be no use for you_

_"__I do believe that is my point"  
You're of much more use to us alive_

_Yes yes much more useful alive_

_"__All because you need someone to torment. Go torment the other prisoners I'm sure they'd love the company"  
That's why were'e here_

_Yes to keep you company_

_"__I don't want it. It's better to be alone."_

I had never spoken back to the voices and now did I see that I had scared them made them nervouse. usually I would just sit here and let them go on and on about how worthless and useless I am but now I just wanted complete silence and isolation, I wanted to be alone. I waited for them to speak up but there was nothing but pure silence just the way I wanted it. I wonder what "crime" Odin has come up with so that he has a reason to lock me back up in this hell, was it for leaving for so long? Being on Midgard after everything that I've done? For resisting Thor when he came to bring me back? Whatever it was it was probably something stupid after all it wasn't like I had actually cause New York any real damage this time, I just wanted to leave for one night but I couldn't even do that right for that one night had turned into something more. But then again had I not left that night then I would never have ran into Banner and everything that he showed me, everything he did for me never would have happened so I guess one thing right happened that night and it's because of Banner that makes me realize that I wouldn't want to go back in time and change that night nor would I change any of the past because if I did then maybe I would never have found this new feeling for the doctor never would have realized how much we had in common or how human I actually am.

The very thought of Banner made my heart hurt more, I should have froze my heart in that glass cell to prevent this terrible heartache, to prevent these tears fighting to form but I couldn't cry no there would be plenty of time for that and yet I could fell it being torn to pieces. I know it's far to late to admit it and that's the only thing that I wished I could change, I wish I could have told him how I felt but I was never really good with admitting feelings. That was a weakness now I should have told him, should have confessed and now it's too late for I'll never see him again. Never feel his hand on my shoulder, see his eyes so full of worry and lightness, never have him wake me from my nightmares, I would never feel that warmth and comfort that he had shown me.

But this time I was truly alone and I most likely was going to die here as well. No guards, no pain, just isolation maybe Odin was going to allow me this much, no more torture just solitude which I was ok with I could handle the silence but I wasn't alone. I could still feel his hand on my shoulder, feel his arm wrap around me as he whispered that everything was going to be ok. Odin knew that something had happened while I was on Midgard and now this was my torment not physical abuse but left to the destruction of my mind and my now beating heart, the chains weren't meant to keep me in place as lashes whipped out at me they were there to keep me from freezing my heart once more so that I didn't feel. That was his game to push me through a new type of torture one that came with losing someone very close did he think that I didn't know how that felt? I destroyed myself over my mother's death and I was left to the torment of Banner's invisible form.

I didn't want to play this game again, I had already been through so much and yet he was persistent on hurting me, breaking me into as many pieces as possible so that I could no longer stand again but it's not like if I did manage that much that I would stand against him. No I was smarter then that, I knew better then to fight back as some prisoners often tried not heeding my word against such an action only to find themselves locked back up where they were to begin with. Like before I had no hope for escape but then again now knowing Odin's plan I don't care that much anymore it only proves that I was right all along. Banner wouldn't come for me, I was all alone, I was probable going to die here, and no one was going to remember me but it was these facts that made me wish even more fro Banner to come and rescue me. I always enjoyed seeing him come proving that after all I was wrong and that he still cared for me, he still wanted me there but now it was to late and there was no way I was going to be saved again.

I clentched my fists so that the chains lashed into my wrists as I closed my eyes but quickly reopened them when I felt a sharp jab and felt something slide down my wrist, looking up I saw blood. The chains I knew prevented me from magic but maybe they had another purpose as well, now I could drown out the mental torment with physical pain. I would much rather suffer physical pain then go through everyday thinking that Banner's here beside me but realizing that it's all in my mind. As I squeezed my fists tighter more blood dripped down only when it really began to hurt did I relax and feel my blood drip down my arm and onto the floor. I had found my escape and in the darkness smiled, I could now balance out how I hurt and when I wanted to bleed it's not often Odin gives a prisoner such a luxury as this but I was greatful for it.

The one thing I missed the most was waking from a terrible dream to find Bruce right beside me, his eyes so full of warmth with his hand resting gently on my shoulder. The imitation that my mind had created wasn't the same as having him really here next to me and soon along with the blood splattered floor tears had mixed with the stains as well as on my skin. No matter how much I bleed he wouldn't go away, I couldn't find solitude, I almost wished for my old punishment over this hell. It was too much and I just wanted it to end, the last time I was able to close my eyes to the darkness, was able to feel my body go numb, and there was no room for these thoughts. THere was only room for pain and now pain seemed just as luxurious as the idea of freedom which apperently was something I would never get, no matter how much I bleed I never had enough pain.

(Bruce)

We worked on finishing the tesseract but it seemed to take an eternity to finish, who knows what's happened to Loki already during these weeks. Who knew what pain he's suffered, what torture he's gone through, how broken he'd became? Never have I've ever worried so much about someone but I had made him so many promises and now everything that I had promised to keep him from I had failed, I had a rare chance of getting into Asgard, I had no idea where this prison was, what I would have to defeat to get to him, or what he'd gone through. It would be a merical just to get there.

"Are you done yet Tony?" I asked for the billienth time.

"Hold on Bruce there's one last thing I have to fix and then it'll be ready besides you don't even know where you have to go."  
"I'll figure it out when I get there. Loki will guide me to him, he always does."  
"What if he doesn't have the strength to?"

I shot him a murderous look he didn't know what he was talking about, Loki never conciously helped me find him but in my mind I could hear him as he directed me where to go so getting to Asgard right now was our biggest problem and the tesseract Tony had built was a one way pass, it could get me there and once i saved Loki I would have to depend on his powers to get us out.

"So how do you know this will work?" I asked

"I don't know if it will or not I'm just hoping that it will. Thor explained a bit about it when I asked him for a sample of it. He was really discriptive about it too." he looked up for a moment "What if Loki can't bring you back? After all didn't he say that his imprisonment had deteriated some of his power, what if he doesn't have enough to get you back?"  
"I don't know first things first though and that's getting me to Asgard once I have Loki freed from his cell we'll work out the rest."

I knew that he could very well be right but right now all that mattered was saving Loki and hoping that I wasn't to late to save him and that he had enough strength to bring us back here. But what if he didn't have enough strength to bring us back? No I would deal with that latter first things first and that's to save Loki from whatever he's gone through so far and this time he'll stay safe without going through any more pain I swear on my own life that this time nothing will seperate us. Tony came over holding the tesseract well actually it floated above his opened hand.

"Is it ready?"  
"I think so but I'm not a thousand percent sure."  
"Well that's good enough for me."

Tony put the cube in a container similar to the one Thor used to take Loki back during the battle of New York and handed it to me.

"Good luck Banner. Bring him back safe."  
"I'll see you soon Tony, thank you."  
"Don't sweat it now go."

I noded, thought of Loki not sure if it would actually work or not as I twisted the handles and watched as everything blurred and I was surrounded by a blinding white flash but I kept focus on Loki he was all that was on my mind. His eyes light up, hearing him laugh, his beautiful smile, I focused on us and what might be in the future. I thought of everything that I could show him and maybe we really could finally escape this world and our monsters and fears. I smiled at the thought and when I opened my eyes I was standing in a whole different world, below me was a rainbow road and before me laid a magnificent city I felt as though I had steeped into a fairytale but I had no time for sightseeing I had to get into the city and find Loki.

I remembered that he said there were two different prisons but which one would he be in now? I looked towards the palace remembering that there was one underneath but it didn't feel right, I turned and looked towards a giant shadow that seemed to devour a small portion of the city but at the same time it didn't seem to be apart of it and so I ran towards it sticking to the very shadows that hide the prison that was keeping Loki captured, the very prison that had led him to seek comfort on Earth and to our very first meeting that had started all of this. I didn't mind the looks some people gave me I didn't care what they thought I just had to get to the prison, I had to save him. When I stopped for a moment I stopped for a moment to catch my breath and I looked up at the darkening sky that was changing multiple shades of pinks and purples that seemed to take my breath away.

"Are you ok mister?"

I looked down and saw a small little boy that reminded me of myself when I was a young boy.

"Hrothmund get back here."

I looked up and so did the boy at an older women wearing rags standing outside one of the houses. Unlike the boy who's eyes shone with happiness her's held sadness and fear, fear of losing the onlything she had left in life.

"Coming mom." He turned back to me "It was nice to meet you mister."

He ran off and inside the house, he was so full of life, didn't no limits or the feelings of pain and loss such as myself or his mother knew to well.

"Would you like to come in for the night it gets terribly cold out."

"Thank you ma'am but I'm looking for someone very dear to me."

"I see I know how that must feel I too lost someone but he never came back to me." she clutched a locket tightly but walked up to me offering me her hand "But I insist that you come in for the night you don't want to be caught out so late especially not in winter."

I noded and taking her hand I let her guide me inside, I knew nothing of Asgardian weather so if she said that it was terrible late at night then I would rest for the night and go back to searching as soon as the sun rose in the sky the next morning. The boy was really joyful to see his mother leading me inside and towards the dining room where they graceiously set up an extra spot and I could tell in the women's eyes that there was a change in the atmosphere just by me sitting there at her table watching as her boy talked excitedly about all the fun he's had but she looked down when he brought up his father. When the boy had gone off to bed I helped the women clean up the kitchen and we sat at the table for a moment staring at one another.

"Your husband that's who you lost isn't he?" I asked

"Yes he left one day and I searched for years trying to find him, I went to both dungeons, traveled all nine realms, I searched everywhere for him but when I found him.."

Her eyes teared up and she burried her head in her arms and as I had done for Loki thousands of times I wrapped my arm around her but it felt strange for she wasn't Loki and she didn't feel the same way as he did.

"I'm sorry. It must pain you greatly...um may I ask your name?"  
"Bethild."

"It's very nice to meet you Beth may I call you that?" she nodded "THank you very much for your hospitality but I must continue my search."

"It's reaching the middle of the night trust me it's no time to be wandering around. I insist take Hrothmund's other bed I'm sure he'll enjoy the company."

I nodded and went upstairs to the little boy's room.

"Are you going to stay for the night mister?" he asked hopefully through tired eyes

I went over to him and pulled the blanket up closer around him and smiled.

"Yeah for the night."  
"What are you going to do then?"  
"I'm going to go save someone very dear to me."  
He yawned but kept his eyes on me "My mother tried to find our dad because he was everything to her."  
"That's how it is with this person I have to save, they're everything to me but the difference between you're mother and me is that she has you but I don't have anyone else."  
"What about your family?"  
"My family is my friends but they don't understand what's between me and this person they don't really agree with us but I don't care what they think."  
"I haven't seen my mother smile in a long time thank you."  
He yawned again and then closed his eyes whispering thank you once more before go off to sleep. I went over to the opened window and looked out and I could see the shadow plane that I would have to cross in order to get to the prison to save Loki, in the dead of night it was impossible to see anything beyond the darkness but I knew that somewhere there was a prison and deep within that prison was the only person that I cared for more then anyone in the entire universe. He was waiting for me and I was going to save him, I was going to give him the chance he wanted to start over, I just hope that he'll still take it and return with me where I can prove just how far I was willing to go just to save him, I really wanted him to stay with me, I wanted to start again myself and I wanted to be by his side every step of the way just as I wanted him to be for me.

"Try and sleep Loki we leave tomorrow." I whispered silently as I got into the spare bed and closed my eyes dreaming of Loki and how happy we'll be once we're back on Earth.

Loki)

The blood was dripping onto the concrete floor as usual and but this time there was no tears to acompany the red drops my eyes had grown to dry for tears and now I hardly even noticed the blood dripping on to the floor or the dried spots covering my arms. I knew what would happen to me so there really wasn't any reason for me to care much about how much I bleed or how much I hurt inside, I didn't really hurt anyways there was nothing to hurt. I shattered my heart instead of freezing it hopeing to never have to use it ever again it was such a useless object anyways what good was a heart if all it did was pain with each breath you took, what good was it if there was no one to love with it, no one to give it to, what good was it when all you wanted to to stop breathing? Hearts where useless and worthless objects that did nothing but hurt people, I was better off when it was frozen, I didn't feel anything and there was nothing to break it but Banner was the one to thaw it out of it's shell and now look where I ended up after trusting the stupid thing to help me heal, I was broken again and this time there was nothing fixed, nothing to help me through the pain, I was nothing more then an empty shell of the former god I used to be.

I knew they would all forget me, that I would spend eternity locked up in this cell for no good reason only so that Odin didn't have to see me. I knew that Thor would forget as well not visiting, not caring if I was alive, not ever caring at all about me. I was nothing more then a distant memory to them, a former friend turned enemy and now I was rotting away in a cell where they didn't have to see me ever again. They probab;y have moved on now forgetting that I was even here at all. I don't blame them for forgetting about me I'd probably forget too but there was one thing that Odin probably didn't expect and that was that while he wanted me to suffer from Banner's invisible form it did the opposite but worked at the same time. While I missed him greatly and it pained me more to know that I would never see him again it helped to feel this much knowing that what had happened was indeed real and not a figment of my own imagination.

_I'm looking for someone_

That couldn't have been Banner and yet there was his voice but it sounded far away, was he here on Asgard? No that couldn't be I had to be going mad.

_The person I'm looking for means a lot to me, I have to find them_

I wanted to shout out, tell him that I was here but he couldn't be here there was no way he could have gotten here not without the tesseract or Thor's power and I doubt that oaf would do such a thing as bring Banner here.

_Get some sleep Loki we leave tomorrow_

It had to be my imagination, had to be my own sick hope that somehow Banner was here and that he was going to rescue me but I knew better then to hope for such a thing. I clentched my fists tighter making myself bleed even more, I cried out in pain hating myself for thinking that anyone would ever come for me, for leaving in the first place, hating myself for everything believing in Banner's empty promises, for hoping that after everything that's happened that there was a possibility that I could escape it all and find the peace that I've always wanted. I was a freak how could i possibly ever find escape, look where I've ended up once again, the very place where I belong, the only place I would ever be for this cell was just a small cell in a prisoned world. Every room I was in was this cell, these chains would always drag behind me, I was a monster and monsters deserved to be locked up, tortured, and left broken and bleeding to die alone in isolation where no one will cry or mourn but instead rejoice knowing that they no longer have to deal with one more freak.

"That's all I am just a monster. A terrible monster parents tell their children about at night." tears came to my eyes remembering all that I was

_Yes your a monster_

_Who would ever love you_

_Your nothing_

"I am nothing aren't I?"  
_Look at all that blood you've spilled_

_How much more are you willing to spill tonight_

_How much further before it's all over_

"Not much more."

_Might as well die now_

_No point in suffering any more then you already have_

_Yes just end your suffering _

_This time there's no one to stop you_

They were right this time I could just close my eyes and bleed knowing that there was no one who would come and stop me, no one to bring me back to life, no one to care any more about me. No one to mourn over my still, lifeless form, no one to cry out and ask why I did such a thing, no one to beg for forgivness for the way I was treated, no one to cry at all or feel even a little saddened by what had become of me. But this is what they all wanted, this was what was best, I could finally find peace, tranquility, freedom from everything that I've been fighting. Free of it all, of the pain, the sadness, the tears, feeling nothing at all. The blood kept dripping down my arm mixing with my tears as I screamed out into the darkness in pure agony but I didn't care, pain was only something worth dying from.


	10. Chapter 10

(Bruce)

When first rays of dawn streaked through the small window I got up and crept my way downstairs and towards the door.

"Be careful."

I turned and in the kitchen I saw Beth sitting at the table with light in her eyes and a smile on her face. I nodded and left the house heading towards the ever lasting darkness of Asgard for there Loki was waiting in a darkened cell, cold, alone, and hurting. I could feel it, I always could feel it when he was hurting and it was a surging pain this time, pain like I've never felt before and I broke into a run racing towards the darkness hoping to get to Loki before it was too late. Something bad was going to happen and I was running out of time to get to him.

"_What are they doing to him? Hang in there Loki I'm on my way"_

_It's to late to save him_

_"__No no it isn't to late"_

_How do you know he isn't dead already_

_"__Because he promised he'd stay"  
Ha he promised_

_He's the god of lies he's not going to be alive_

_"__Shut up. Loki please I'm almost there"_

The voices were wrong he was still alive I knew he was but then again they were also right that I was running out of time. As I entered the shadows I didn't stop running I kept going determined to reach Loki no matter how far I had to run I would get to him one way or another, I would kill whoever stood in my way from getting to him, I would destroy the very realm if I had to just to get to him, nothing was going to stop me this time from saving him, nothing was going to keep us apart. As I neared a steep cliff though I stopped for a moment to gaze up at the tower that stood before me, it seemed to reach into the very sky and dissapered into the darkness that surrounded it but I ran inside anyways.

_"__Loki where are you please help me find you"_

Looking around I found several sets of stairs but I didn't take any of them instead I headed towards a wall at the end of the hall and ran straight through it finding a descending set of stairs before me and I sprinted down them smiling. I had to remember that this was Asgard, this was a darkened prison where the most dangerous of prisoners were held, this was a place where magic was common and so I had to think like Loki, well I probably could have thought like I was Odin but I'd rather think like Loki I always thought like him when I went to rescue him. Feeling his pain and seeing things through his eyes helped me understand the god and where he was, because he felt the type of pain that no one should ever have to feel.

At the bottom of the stairs I ran through the halls not looking in any of the cells to see if Loki was there I knew that he wasn't, I would have to go down several more flights before I reached him so I had no time to waste on sightseeing and none of them mattered to me only Loki mattered and I was going to save him. How could someone be so cruel as to build such a place as this? Did Odin realize what he was doing, did he even care? I didn't understand how he was even a king, a king is suppose to rule his people yes but he's also suppose to protect them and by giving punishment to a place like this wasn't right. As I ran down the halls all I heard was screams of torture, the smell of blood was overpowering, and there was pain and sadness radiating in the very halls and all I wanted to do was fall to the ground and cry but I couldn't I had to be strong and keep going I had to save Loki before it was to late.

I couldn't save them all I knew that but I could save the fallen prince, I could save an innocent man from a terrible fate a second time, I could save Loki just as I had promised him. I could prove to him that freedom was possible, that he could escape it all and that I was going to be there by his side through it all. Just thinking about the future gave me new strength and I ran faster down the hall and down the last flight of stairs but nothing could have prepared me for what I saw. There he sat on the little bench hands chained behind him as where his feet, but the darkness had hide hie true condition, as I unlocked the cell and stepped inside I stopped and noticed hte small pool beneath him. Leaning down I saw it was a mixture of blood and tears only then did I notice he wasn't breathing as blood dripped down his arm and tears still streaking his pale face. I un-chained him and he slumped forward into my arms, his wrists completely cut open.

"Oh Loki what have you done to yourself?"

I could feel a slight pulse but it was slow and his breathing was labored but he was still alive but not for long.

"Ok Hulk ready to save someone again?"

Inside I could hear the monster grunt in agreement and holding Loki close in my arms I ran back out of the prison, once outside I stopped quickly when I felt Loki shift in my arms. His eyes were shut tight in pain and his wrists still bleed but I picked up speed once more and continued to run back into the city and out of the darkness. When I reached the little house that I had stayed in the night before Beth's eyes light up to see me standing there but she quickly ushered me inside seeing Loki in my arms. We took him upstairs into a seperate room that looked very similar to the medical room at Tony's home.

"What has become of our prince?" she asked

I had forgotten that Loki was a prince and figured many hadn't heard of his long punishment or that he had left Asgard for some time and only now returned. But when Beth looked towards me and horror had taken over her eyes just as Loki's often protrayed and so I told her about some of what has happened to Loki since he returned from the war on New York. She listened carefully as we quickly did everything we both thought of to save Loki. When our work had finished she sat down in a nearby chair exhuasted of her work.

"Why would Allfather do such a terrible act to his own son?"

"Because Loki was nothing but another stolen relic to him. I couldn't believe it myself when Loki told me what had happened to him."  
"This can't be the same prince that came to me so many times for help." I looked at her confused "Magic had interested him and sometimes he would learn of a potion and come asking me for help, he was such an excited young boy. IS this really the same one?"  
""Unfortunetly so, I couldn't believe he was the same god that had tried to destroy New York, I feel terrible knowing that I was part of the group that had put him in that prison the first time now I'm the reason he was returned there."

She placed her hand on top of mine and smiled.

"It's not your fault you just wanted to help him. I can't believe that Thor would let Allfather do such a thing though."  
"Me neither but apperently we were both wrong."

"Yes, yes we were."

The little boy came running in but quickly stopped and carefully approached the bed when he saw Loki.

"Mommy is that the prince?" he asked scared

She picked up the little boy and placed him on her lap and looked down at him.

"Yes it is."  
"What's wrong with him?"

"He's just sick is all and I'm going to help him get better. WHy don't you go play with your friends ok?"  
"Ok mom."

We watched the boy run out of the room and heard the front door closing downstairs. I knelt beside Loki and held his cold, limp hand in mine, he looked to be sleeping but I knew that he was slowly dying and I was coming closer to losing him every second that passed.

"He'll be ok I swear, you wont lose him."

"Thank you very much Beth I appreciate this very much."  
"No problem after my husband...I've made it my goal to save everyone that comes to me."

She left me alone with Loki and I looked back down at the sleeping god.  
"She's been hurting too Loki, just like us but we have each other to heal our wounds. We have each other and we always will."

I rested my head next to him, still holding tightly onto his hand afraid that if I let go I'll lose him forever, I can't lose him not after everything that I promised, not after everything that we've been through. Never have I ever wanted to save someone so much before but I wanted to be with Loki, to make him happy, and never knowing pain ever again, the word would become foreign to him and it'll never bother him for the rest of our lives. Instead he'd wake up happy, smiling, knowing that he was safe and that nothing was going to hurt him or come and take him away, he'd be free of it all. We'd both be free of this pain, we'd both be happy that's all that I wanted was to be happy again and to show him that freedom was possible even for us monsters, that everyone deserves a second chance and that I was giving him that chance to change, to prove to the world that he was different now, to show the world the Loki that I knew and feel in love with.

He slept so peacfully almost like a child, eyes shut close, breathing slow, showing almost no signs of life the only difference was that he was losing life, slowly dying in his sleep not even aware of what was happening around him, not aware that I was here right by his side, he wasn't aware of how terrified I was of losing him again. I kept my head rested on his chest so that I could listen to his slow heart beating it comforted me in letting me know that he was still alive and that he'd be ok and sometimes I would feel the slight squeeze of my hand so I never let go hoping that one day that gesture would get stronger and this would be just a terrible dream.

"You should eat Banner. You need your strength."

"I'll be fine Beth, I'll be fine as soon as Loki wakes up."  
She came in and sat a small tray down on a table.

"He must mean a lot to you." I could only nod "I'm glad he meet you, I've been watching him for a while and it's nice to know that there's someone that cares about him."

"You know?" I asked shocked that this poor women cared about Loki as well

"Yes I was part of the riot against that dreaded prison. It was a waste of energy to build and it's a crime against humanity. It doesn't matter if we're gods or not we're still human and that "place" is a crime in itself."

I agreed with her, I told her how I felt when I was in there rescuing Loki. Turns out she had gone there trying to ind her husband and went mad by the torture she had witnessed inside. She never told her son but her husband had been brutaly beatened in prison when he did nothing wrong but part-take in a past riot that happened a thousand years ago.

"Whenever he asks about his father I just tell him that he's in a better place now and that he no longer needs us. He's to young to understand what Odin's capable of doing that's why I always hoped that Loki would take the throne."  
"Do you know what he is?"  
"Of course I do he told me the moment he found out, poor boy was so upset he couldn't even go to Frigga instead he came to me. Honestly I still would rather have him ascend to the throne then Thor. I think Asgard could prosper from having a king like him."

She looked over at Loki's still form smiling to herself at the found memories of the past. This women had taken care of Loki when he was little and helped him with his powers, she believed in him just as I did, believed in the good, the bad, and yet still saw him fit for the throne even though that was now the one thing that he didn't want. But there was one thing nawing at the back of my mind.

"What if Thor should come?"  
She began to laugh "Please Thor doesn't even know me nor does he know what Odin has done to his brother. He'd never come here looking for Loki." She went towards the door.

"It's hard to believe don't you think. That Thor would let Loki suffer this way?"  
"That's where we have to disagree doctor banner for Thor is arrogant and often forgets about Loki, far to often."

WIth that she left the room and I couldn't help but think about what she had said about Thor often forgetting about Loki but I couldn't believe it. Thor always talked about Loki as though he was the only person that mattered. But then again she also said how Loki came to her and Thor didn't even know? I would never do that to Loki, I would always be with him, making sure he was ok. How could Thor even say he was Loki's brother when brothers look out for each other no matter what, it doesn't matter if they're adopted or not they should always stand by one another, always have each others back, and be there to pick them up when they fall down. Not abandon the other because they made a few bad choices, or forget about them when they need the other the most. This isn't what brothers do for each other, this isn't what friends do either.

After everything that's happened so far I don't care if I never see any of the others , I'm not sure I even want to be apart of the Avengers any more. I know that might seem dramatic but I'd rather be there for Loki then be with people who don't see how wrong we were the first time, people who couldn't see that he was hurting, that he just wanted a chance to prove himself.

"I promise Loki I'll never be like that. I'll always be here for you."

Weeks seemed to pass by and slowly Loki seemed to be getting better, he was breathing more, his pulse seemed normal, and now all there was to do was wait for him to wake up and then we could leave this place and return to Earth where we could pick up where we left off. I liked the sound of that, returning to Earth with Loki and proving to everyone that they were wrong about the prince, that even us monsters could change, that we were capable of more then destruction and chaos, that we too could do good. That in the end we all can change even the damaged ones, even the ones that the everyone thought could never change, that they were stuck on being evil for eternity because of a few bad decisions or because of our past.

Like many nights before I had fallen asleep on Loki's chest but this time my dreams were haunted by a bloody body lying in my arms, tears streaking down blue cheeks as Loki begs me not to save him, not this time. He tells me that he's had enough and would rather die then live again, to many people have hurt him, to many have taken him from me but I didn't want to let him go, I couldn't I begged him not to leave to keep fighting that I could still save him after all haven't I always saved him?

"Loki please don't go." I begged him

_Banner_

"No I wont let you go"  
_Banner open your eyes_

I did as the voice told me and as I opened my eyes this time I was comforted by glistening emerald eyes that sparkled in the low lighted room, his arms around me.

"Loki."

He smiled and noded, tears still in the corners of his eyes but he was alive and he was here at my side unlike so many times when it was me who would wake him from a terrible dream and have my arms wrapped around him comforting him.

"Thank you." he said his arms still holding me tightly "Thank you for proving me wrong and keeping your promise to come and save me no matter where I am."

We pulled away but our hands still held each other.

"I'm just glad that I got here in time to save you. I was terrified that I had lost you forever this time."

"Sorry for giving up on you so early."  
"You should be sorry, scaring him like that I thought I taught you better then that."

I turned around and saw Beth walk in smiling.

"It's good to see you again, and I see your smiling again oh how I missed seeing it."

She just smiled and came over to him.

"How are you feeling?" she asked

"Alright, how have you been?"  
"I've been holding on it's good to see you again Loki never do something like this again or I'll kill you."

"It's ok I don't think you'll have this problem again, I think I've bothered banner quite a bit already with this act."  
"Sometimes I wonder if your trying to kill us both."  
"Oh if I wanted that then I would have killed you the first time."

We started laughing and didn't notice that Beth had already left the room and had closed the door behind her. I turned back to Loki still smiling.

"Thank you for all that you've done for me Banner I truly don't deserve it."  
"Shut up of course you do, you deserve this more then any one else."  
"I don't want to hurt you anymore Banner..."  
"You don't think you hurt me every minuet when you're not here with me? Loki I don't want you to leave I know I've said it before but I'm serious I want you to stay I want to be by your side. I want you to stay forever."

His eyes glistened again with sadness but they were a happy type of sadness that came with joy, I went to the other side of him and sat up on the bed next to him with my arm around him and our eyes meet once more.

"Banner."

"Yes Loki?"  
"Do you really want me to stay with you?"

"Of course I do Loki I care so much about you."

He seemed to lean in closer to me and his eyes asked the very question that he said.

"How much?"

"This much."

The gap between us close and our lips found each other, his were smooth and soft and I loved the taste of them. We pulled back for a moment and I swear my heart stopped beating as I stared into his beautiful emerald eyes.

(Loki)

My heart slightly raced as the gap closed between us and stopped when our lips touched I loved it, his lips were perfect in every way. Time seemed to stand still for that moment and I didn't want it to start again but as he pulled away my heart countinued to raced and I rested my head on his shoulder as he wrapped his arms tightly around me. Banner had loved me the same way I loved him, he wanted me just as much I as him.

"Please don't leave me again Loki."  
"Why would I leave everything that I've ever wanted?" I looked up into his eyes "I don't want to leave you Banner and I wont leave you, not ever again. I promise."

He smiled and his hand gently rubbed my arm and I liked the feeling of being wanted, or being needed and I didn't care if it was Banner who had given me such feelings, I didn't care if he was a mortal, I wanted to be with him and no one else. I would gladly give up my immortality and Asgardian citinzenship just to be with him and no one else.

"Do you think you have enough energy to get us back down to Earth?" Banner asked

"Not right now but in a few days I think I can make the trip."  
"Then in a few days we shall leave and pick back up where we started how about that?"  
"I think that sounds marvelous my dear Banner."


	11. Chapter 11

Throughout the next few days Bethild left me alone with Banner for most of the time only coming in once or twice with food or to help me heal she's such a wonderful lady, I owe her so much for all the help she has given me throughout my life. But for now all I could think about was Banner beside me and feeling safe and comfort once more just as it had been before being dragged back here. This was where I wanted to be more then anywhere else throughout all nine realms, I wanted to be here next to the only person to ever care this much for me, the only person to ever make me feel safe and wanted. Now I see that while this heart might be broken it's far from useless, without it I wouldn't be able to feel this care, wouldn't be able to love Banner or have something to give him. This heart was all that I had left but it was also all that I needed as long as I could feel the way I did now then I would gladly give up everything else but all I had was this beaten down heart of mine and that was all that I wanted.

To see if I did indeed have enough strength to use enough power to get me and Banner back on Earth I practiced a few simple tricks just to bring my magic back up to the surface, through my imprisonment I had learned how to hide my magic deep down until I was free and then I could bring back to the surface for use. I tried something really simple that I had never done before but seeing Banner's eyes light up as tiny green butterflies fluttered out of green sparks and danced around the room felt amazing seeing him watch the animated butterflies and marvel at such a simple trick.

"DO you like this trick Banner?"  
"They're beautiful Loki." he looked down "But your eyes are prettier."

He pushed a strand of hair from my face and I leaned against his chest comforted by the sound of his heart slowly beating, I closed my eyes for a moment and felt very calmed. My eyes began to close as the rising and lowering as well as the soothing sound of his heart beat calmed me down and I began to doze off. There was nothing that could possibly make this moment better, I was next to the only one who loved me and the only one I loved, he was going to protect me and I knew that he would still be there when I woke up, his arm still around me as it always was when I woke from a dream.

"Get some rest Loki." Banner said lightly kissing the top of my head as I fell into the darkness prepared for anything to happen for I knew that what I would see would be nothing more then a dream and that the no matter what they said they were just voices that couldn't feel, they didn't know how this felt, they could never understand so why should I listen to them any more? What truth could they possible tell me after all they only drove me towards suicide, they were no better then Odin they were only trying to tear me and Banner apart well not any more, no now no one was going to seperate us no matter what I would never be pulled away from Banner's side.

When the darkness faded away I found myself in an open field underneath a big oak tree with Banner by my side. We were staring up at the sky as it was streaked with shades of pinks and light purples, the sun was beginning to set over Brooklyn harbor and there was no one around us just the way I liked it to be. This I knew was our future, someday we really would be lying under this tree watching the sky as the sun slowly set over the harbor coloring the sky with thousands of colors. Someday we would both be happy not knowing pain or sadness ever again, no instead we would both be happy, safe, and best of all we would be free from everything that had haunted us. TOgether we would destroy the demons, and ignore the voices, together we would move on from all that has stopped us from gaining what we've both wanted.

For the first time in years I actually enjoyed sleeping, I enjoyed dreaming knowing that this time I saw a more realistic future with Banner, one that I knew would happen for sure and one that I was looking forward towards. I didn't want to wake from this dream but I knew that there was a better dream awaiting me back down on the very realm that I had tried so hard to destroy and conqure, a dream that would become reality as soon as I opened my eyes and steeped foot off of this hell. I had found my savior, my "angle" as the mortals call people such as Banner and now he was taking me to a place that I could call home, a place where I was wanted and belonged, a place where I could show the world that I had changed, a place where I didn't have to hide and run away from everyone because I was afraid. I never thought that a place like that exsisted but now I see that in order to have gained all of this I had to lose everything that I had but this frozen heart, I had to try and prove myself, had to be stopped and tortured relentlessly, all that in order to help Thor and prove the world that I was changed, only to escape and find Banner to find that there was still hope for me. Everything that has happened to me so far was a simple sacrifice in order to gain so much more I believe it's known as "equivilant exchange" to the mortals who have tried to combine magic and science.

But I knew that this wasn't equivilant, I could never give up enough in order to equal what I had gained but maybe that's what they wanted, some force was giving me a break. Perhaps it was my mother still looking out for me knowing that I had suffered enough and now was showing me the light at the end of the tunnle even from the dead she was guiding me to everything that I had ever truly wanted, I didn't want a throne, a crown, or even to be Thor's equal, I just wanted someone who loved me, someone who cared for me and wanted me to be there by their side, to feel exactly just as I did now whenever I was with Banner. This was what I had wanted and this is what I had recieved after all my years of suffereing and I would gladly go through all of it again knowing that in the end this would be my reward.

We got up very early the next morning hoping to get away before everyone in Asgard wakes for surly then it would be most difficult to escape the eyes of the guards that knew of my return and had thought I was locked up, abandoned and suffering, I almost laughed at how I imagined the look on their faces as they find out that I am no longer in that cell.

"It was a pleasure meeting you doctor Banner." she shook Banner's hand and then she turned towards me "Don't let us meet this way again Loki." She pulled me into a tight embrace and whispered in my ear "Be safe my prince."

With that we left the city that once I had called home but now had turned into the true prison that it was and I was leaving it all behind, I was finally going to find freedom and this time I knew that it was for real, that I was truly safe and that all my struggling was finally over, I had won this brutal war that had left me scared and broken but now I was going to heal knowing that it was finally all over.

"Are you ready to go home Loki?"

Home? That was right I was going home, a place that I had never had before until my meeting with Banner and only now did I see that I was truly going home for the first time. I was going to a place that fit the very word itself, a place where I belonged, and a place where I wanted to stay. I took hold of his hand and kissed it lightly.

"I am if you are."

He noded and I closed my eyes, imagining Banner's home, I saw the living room, the sun peeking through the closed blinds and I felt my body dissolve into the sky but as soon as I opened my eyes we were no longer in Asgard but back on Earth in Banner's living room.

"Welcome home Loki."

**A/N Ok so I might write a sequal to this story about Loki in the future with Banner and how he compares the life he has now to the life he had before and how much has changed. He's still fighting but Banner has kept his promise to stand by his side and is trying everything he can to help Loki heal but is the prince to broken to be fixed? Can Banner convince the Avengers that Loki has changed and what not? Review what you think. I would also like to thank Shadowcat ninja for amazing ideas and also trisk sanmaho for helping me write most of the content throughout this story your both amazing writers.**


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